Aftermath
by andree campbell
Summary: Cuddy and House react to their breakup and work through the pain in different but similar ways. No one works harder than Wilson to understand and fix the split.  For all wounded-hearted Huddies. Here's how I'd like to see things happen on the show.
1. Chapter 1 Shellshocked Revised

**(Revised) Post Bombshell**

_**Readers, my apologies for posting the wrong version of Aftermath's Ch. 1 Shell-shocked. In my hurry, I posted an incomplete version. The version below was revised and completed. Please re-read for slightly different directions in the story. Thanks for your patience and I apologize for the inconvenience.**_

She rolled over in her bed and stared through bleary eyes swollen from crying. The clock's time slowly came into focus. 3:38 am. Cuddy laid back against her pillow and allowed her left arm to slide over_ his_ side of the bed, remembering what he looked like asleep between her sheets. Her eyes filled with tears as a large, hard knot rose inside her throat. It hurt so much. The void. Knowing he wasn't ever going to lay beside her again.

She felt the bile rising in her chest as she raced for the bathroom and nicked her shoulder against the edge of the door frame. It would most certainly leave a bruise. She could barely see straight but made it to the bathroom sink before heaving the entire contents of her stomach. Mostly liquid bile. She felt empty in every possible way.

Turning the warm water knob, Cuddy filled her hand with enough water to wash her bitter lips. She stared at her reflection in the mirror above the sink and was shocked at what she saw. A lifeless woman stared back with the saddest grey eyes she'd ever seen. Was it possible to look as bad as she felt? Yes. She turned the water off after rinsing out her sink and headed back to bed. She took comfort in knowing she wouldn't have to see him today. Her kidney surgery allowed her time off to heal at home. Still, In less than a few hours she'd either hear from Wilson about the break-up or from House if he tried to change her mind. She knew she'd have to see him at the hospital and the thought of it made her curl up into a fetal position.

How did this happen? Why _couldn't_ they just be happy together? Why did he have to negate everything? He wasn't there for her in the good times _and _the bad. He missed the award event last week, he avoided her when she was terrified of possibly having cancer. He let her down again and again. He was a nightmare and it_ took_ nightmares for her to see that clearly, that House would always leave her alone to fend for herself.

She wanted to hate him but Cuddy was too hurt to do anything more than mourn the loss of what could have been. She would eventually have to deal with him and the disappointment. It would hurt like hell to see him, now more than ever if he was back on vicodin. She hoped he _would_ avoid her today and her office when she returned, let her have the space she needed to heal her raw emotions.

She closed her eyes and bit her lip hoping to distract herself for a microsecond of the internal misery coursing through her heart and mind. She'd get through this. She had too, for Rachel's sake. Cuddy was strong. That's what everyone said and most times they were right. But, right now, Cuddy was devastated and no one and nothing could fix this. The pain of the break-up overrode any relief to celebrate the good news of a benign tumor. The surgery incision in her back was tender and she'd need to change the bandages and Julia or the nanny would help her with that. She wanted it to be House but ….. She felt hot tears sliding down her face. She tried to force herself to not think about him but it was impossible.

Instead, her mind's eye wandered over to House's apartment. She let herself in mentally and closed his front door. She could see herself there as she'd glanced throughout his place and likely see the empty bottle of scotch on the coffee table and the hole in the wall between his two guitars. Knowing House, he would have punched the wall. Maybe to find a hidden stash of vicodin, or to vent his anger at _her_ or at himself for sliding back into drugs. She simply couldn't stop crying. The pain she felt inside was too intense. She visualized what he might be doing. Then she saw him.

House was stretched out on his bed, bare chested and lying on his back, eyes wide open as if in shock. She could imagine him catatonic. Unanswered voicemails on his cell phone causing the message light to flash green in a steady pulse. He'd ignore it. That was how he dealt with things. Avoidance.

Cuddy didn't know what hurt more. The disappointment she felt in House ruining everything or the knowledge she had caused him so much pain after he begged her not to break up with him? She grieved for both reasons and for the realization he'd be an absence in her life and in her bed. She felt insignificant, miserable and dead inside.

She closed her eyes and prayed for sleep. She need to escape this new dismal reality without him in her life. "Please just don't let me dream," she whispered aloud.

* * *

The phone rang loudly beside her bed at 7:30 am sharp. Cuddy stared at the phone and couldn't bring herself to answer it. It could be House. It could be Wilson. But it could also be Julia. Cuddy realized the phone had stopped ringing and had been answered. Cuddy lifted the receiver carefully and listened. It was Julia and Wilson!

"...he's not answering his cellphone so I figured he was at Cuddy's place." Wilson said.

"House isn't here...anymore," Julia replied.

"What? Anymore?" Wilson was caught offguard.

"Cuddy's asleep right now." Julia added quickly.

"Good. She needs to take care of herself and rest. I'll stop by later today to check up on her and make sure everything's healing properly," Wilson said. "Uh...about House….did you say 'anymore'?"

Julia stalled, unsure of what to say knowing Cuddy's penchant for personal privacy but this was James Wilson she was talking to.

"Julia?" Wilson prompted. "Are you still there?"

"Yes, I'm still here. You really need to talk with House after last night," Julia blurted out.

Cuddy held her breath as she held her hand over the receiver. The pauses in their conversation felt like an eternity.

"Did something happen last night?" Wilson sounded alarmed.

"Something pretty bad." Julia admitted.

Wilson felt fear in his stomach. "To Cuddy or House?"

"Both. They broke up." Julia sounded angry. "She's a wreck and God knows what that idiot will do!"

"Oh God! Why? What the hell happened?"

"James, I've told you too much. Maybe Cuddy should tell you. Why don't you …."

"Julia, please just tell me what happened!" Wilson was pleading.

"All I know is that House is using drugs again and Cuddy found out and broke it off with him."

Wilson was speechless. He knew Cuddy had to be devastated. He knew House was either insane or a train wreck himself over the split. He had to find him now.

"Julia, Julia...I'm going to find House and make sure he's okay and after that, I'll come see Cuddy, okay?

"Fine," Julia mumbled. "I just don't know why House had to screw up everything. He's hurt my sister so much that I don't really want to see him back in her life. I want her to be happy."

"I understand you. I'm just as confused as you are but these two are ruined by each other for anyone else. You know that don't you?" Wilson defended his friend despite House's undeserving behaviors. "You take care of Cuddy, I'll take care of House."

Julia felt little sympathy for House. "Whatever, just don't let him come over here." With that she hung up.

Cuddy quietly returned the phone to its cradle and lay back in bed wondering what Wilson would find when he finds House. She closed her eyes and waited for Julia to come check on her.

* * *

Wilson sat stunned. Julia could have gotten it wrong. Maybe House and Cuddy just had a fight and Julia thought it was over. He knew better. If House had a relapse and was back on drugs, it would crush Cuddy. He knew what that felt like. This had to be about Cuddy's surgery and House screwing it up by leaving her all alone to face it by herself. If anything, Wilson recognized a pattern, especially House's patter of shitty behavior.

Wilson grabbed his keys, briefcase and coat before heading out the door in a hurry. He had to find House before House did something stupid.

* * *

Wilson parked his car outside House's apartment building and scanned the street looking for House's car and motorcycle. The car was there. The bike was not. Not a good sign. Wilson knew House wasn't home but he figured he had to check the apartment. Maybe he could find out where House went.

It took a few minutes of high pressure discussions with the building's super to get the elderly man to open House's apartment and let Wilson in. Wilson glanced around and did a quick tour through the place. House was definitely not there. Wilson sat on the couch and thought. I_f I were an idiot drug addict where would I go after my girlfriend dumped me?_

Wilson reasoned through several ideas and realized House would not go to the hospital. He would not go to Cuddy's home - to much humiliation. He would not go see Wilson for the same reason. Where the hell would he go? Where the hell did he get the drugs? Wilson got up and processed the room. There was alcohol - scotch in the bottom of a glass on the coffee table. The bottle was empty, on its side on the floor under the table. _Shit._

Wilson checked the kitchen. Nothing. He checked the bedroom. The bed was unmade. _Good_. At least he slept here. Checking the bathroom Wilson found it undamaged. If House was back on vicodin, he'd likely have the pills with him. Useless to search for it here. Wilson wrote a note and propped it up on the flat-screen TV. It read:

_House, I know about the drugs and Cuddy leaving you. Call me. Don't do anything stupid. Wilson._

Wilson locked the door behind him and left. Where would House go? The bars are closed. Wilson would drive around for a while knowing it was pointless but he had to look for his friend. House had to be somewhere.

* * *

Julia peeked in on Cuddy who was lying motionless in bed, eyes still closed. "Are you awake?" Julia asked softly. Cuddy's eyes fluttered.

"The phone woke me," Cuddy replied with her eyes still closed.

Julia walked in and sat on the bed, reaching for her sister's hand.

"Is Rachel…." Cuddy began.

"She's fine," Julia reassured her. "Marina's here. She's got her."

Cuddy relaxed a little as her sister stroked her hand. "How's your back?"

Cuddy rolled toward Julia and felt a small pain over her kidney from the surgical incision. "Not too bad...still sore."

"That's normal, right?" Julia wasn't a doctor but knew Cuddy would tell her if something was wrong. Cuddy nodded. Julia took stock of her sister's swollen, sad eyes.

"That was Wilson on the phone," Julia said gently.

"I know. I heard the whole thing," Cuddy interjected.

"Are you mad at me?" Julia held her breath.

"No."

"I told Wilson what happened, about House and the drugs and…."

Cuddy felt tears welling up and was powerless to stop them. "I heard."

"Wilson is going to come over soon after he finds him," Julia tried to comfort her sister but knew nothing could.

"He's not going to find him," Cuddy said bluntly. "Not at the apartment or the hospital."

"How do you know?" Julia said out of curiosity but aware too late of the sting in the words.

"I just do, I always …" Cuddy's face crumpled and she began to cry. Julia tried to hug her and ended up stroking her hair.

"I'm staying here with you, today, okay?" Julia whispered. Cuddy nodded and squeezed her sister's hand.

_**Dear Readers, again, please accept my apology for publishing the wrong and incomplete version earlier of Aftermath's first chapter. I will update this soon and I appreciate all the wonderful reviews and comments so far. Hope you stick with the story!**_


	2. Shrapnel

_"Wilson is going to come over soon after he finds him," Julia tried to comfort her sister but knew nothing could._

_"He's not going to find him," Cuddy said bluntly. "Not at the apartment or the hospital."_

_"How do you know?" Julia said out of curiosity but aware too late of the sting in the words._

_"I just do, I always …" Cuddy's face crumpled and she began to cry. Julia tried to hug her and ended up stroking her hair. _

_"I'm staying here with you, today, okay?" Julia whispered. Cuddy nodded and squeezed her sister's hand._

_

* * *

**Ch. 2 Schrapnel**  
_

Julia sat and waited on Cuddy's bed, listening to the shower and could faintly make out the sounds of her sister crying. "I fucking hate you, House!" Julia said aloud to herself.

After a few minutes, Cuddy emerged from the bathroom in yoga pants and a sweatshirt, her hair up in a damp, twisted towel.

"I know you're not going to eat anything but I'm still going to make you some tea and toast. Come on, folllow me," Julia rose from the bed and gently took her sister's arm.

"Does Marina know...about House?" Cuddy seemed embarrassed.

"Probably not."

"Probably?"

"She wasn't in the room when I spoke to Wilson."

Cuddy nodded and allowed herself to be led to the kitchen. She could hear Rachel and Marina in Rachel's room playing on the floor. Cuddy wanted to see her daughter. It would make her feel better, take her mind off of things.

"Wait until after your tea, you'll look better," Julia said as if she had read Cuddy's mind.

"Yeah, okay." Cuddy was glad to have her sister with her. Someone who knew her and was there for her.

* * *

Cuddy sat on the couch feeling sapped of all energy, unable to move. Her laptop was open and stared back at her from the coffee table. She stared at the screensaver, her face devoid of any emotion. Just a few days ago she and House had snuggled on this couch. They were happy, then. She recalled the feeling of his thigh pressed next to hers. Her shoulder leaning against his as he reclined in that sloppy way he had. She closed her eyes and touched her hand to her shoulder that had been pressed against his just days before only to find it tender and bruised from the bathroom doorway she hit this morning. Life hurt.

She felt the tears welling up in her eyes and tried to keep from letting them escape.

"Are you alright, Cuddy?"

It was James Wilson's voice. Cuddy's eyes flew open. Her hand dropped from her sore shoulder. She hadn't heard the doorbell.

"No." Cuddy said so softly that Wilson moved closer. He took in her swollen eyes and pink-tinged nose. "Did you find him?"

"No." Wilson sounded annoyed but worried. Julia hovered from the foyer and watched the two friends. She silently crept forward and sat in the club chair across from them, unnoticed.

"_I _did it. I ended it with House." Cuddy said as she looked up into his brown eyes. Wilson nodded helplessly. "He's back on Vicodin."

"He relapsed. It's what addicts do." Wilson had to try to get Cuddy to realize all wasn't lost.

"I know that, James. I'm not an idiot!" Cuddy snapped. Wilson sat down next to Cuddy and waited for her to continue. "He couldn't deal with ...with the thought I might die on him and was stoned on Vicodin when he finally came to be with me. I thought he was …."

Wilson was flabbergasted. "Are you sure it is vicodin?"

"He confessed."

"When?"

"Last night. I went to his place and told him I knew. He asked me how I knew."

"At least he didn't lie to you about it."

"Did you hear what I said, James?"

"I heard you, Lisa. I'm just having a ...a hard time processing..." Wilson felt all hope drain out of his body as his hands fell into his lap, devoid of any energy or movement. "Did he say why...?"

"He said he was scared his 'girlfriend might die.'"

"I know the feeling, it's ...unbearable being helpless and waiting …."

Cuddy realized suddenly that James Wilson knew _exactly_ what House had felt.

"When Amber died I hated House. I wanted him to die. I was so ….angry," Wilson acknowledged. "But I came to realize it wasn't his fault, not really."

Cuddy looked at Wilson. Was he telling her she was wrong? "House didn't take Vicodin because he was scared I'd die...he took it because he couldn't handle the emotional pain. He uses Vicodin to hide from it, to protect himself, to pretend…"

"You don't think I know that?" Wilson cut her off. "He's an addict and addicts slip up when things get too bad. It's why their addicts in the first place! Shitty judgement. They use anything they can find to make the pain stop, to escape feeling ….to escape their lives." Wilson sounded so sure.

Cuddy realized she was crying.

"You're going to be okay, Lisa. House does stupid things all the time. You'll get past this."

Cuddy shook her head. "I can't be with him if he's on Vicodin. He's not really with me if he's on drugs. I can't let him be around Rachel…

"House loves you, Lisa. I've never been more certain of anything in my life..." Wilson interrupted.

"He _needs_ me. That's not the same thing as loving me. When you love someone, you put them first, their needs, their feelings, ….House just can't do that."

"Yet." Wilson pushed. "We both know he had a messed up childhood. The abuse was bound to damage him. He's gone through life seeking unconditional love, something he never had. Life's been unfair to him. An abusive father, the infarction in his leg...it's proof in his mind that God hates him, so he hates God. Who would blame him?"

"He doesn't believe in God."

"He denies there _**is**_ a God because he can't see past the bad things in his life." Wilson hesitated before continuing on. "He needs answers, you know that better than anyone. When House thought you were dying, he panicked. He couldn't deal with not knowing, not being able to fix things. Losing you would be losing everything left in his life that mattered. It really would be the end of his world."

"But he didn't lose me. He took drugs _before_ my surgery."

"That's because when I told him about the tumors in your lungs, he thought it was over. Foreman told me all he could say was 'she's dead.'"

Cuddy looked away. "I didn't break up with him because he took one pill." Wilson instinctively leaned in and put his arm around her shoulders and squeezed her shoulder.

"House is an addict because he can't deal with pain. We all thought it was just about physical pain but its also about protecting himself from emotional pain."

Wilson nodded in spite of himself.

"He's spent so much time and energy trying to insulate himself from being vulnerable and open with me. I thought he really was capable of loving me but I realize I was just fooling myself." Cuddy felt all the emotional wounds opening again, the pain hit so hard she cringed physically. Wilson pulled her close and hugged her tighter.

"He's emotionally stunted. We both know that, Cuddy." Wilson rubbed her back a little. "In his mind, he's still that little powerless kid staring up at a big man beating the hell out of him just because he can. That's how House sees life, how he sees the world. He's afraid of everything that matters because when he cares about someone, they only hurt him in the end. He thinks about that every time he uses his cane, that he needs a crutch. He has to lean on something to get by. Losing you would have killed him. He knew you needed him and he wanted to be with you but he couldn't ...not without a crutch. It's who he's become."

Cuddy knew Wilson was right but it wasn't what she had planned for her life and for Rachel's. "I can't save him from himself. No one can. He has to save himself, he has to get through this on his own and if I'm there, he won't. I'll be his crutch. If he wants to be with me, he has to be emotionally present. I need him to be invested and he's not."

Wilson knew exactly what she meant. His whole life Wilson was always the first one to become emotionally invested in any relationship. It's why he sought out women who needed emotional comfort, something he was exceptionally good at doing. He enabled them to heal and when they did, they left him because he wasn't there for them, he was there to be needed. It's why nothing lasted. Why he was divorced three times. Until he met Amber. They had had a real chance and then she died. Then Wilson had House who needed someone to watch over him as he recovered from vicodin addiction.

"I know this won't help but I admire you," Wilson said softly. "You're stronger than most people and you don't fool easily." Cuddy pulled back to look at Wilson as if he were crazy.

"I just said I let myself be fooled…."

Wilson cut her off. "I know that but anyone can be lulled into believing in those they love. But when _you_ realized the truth, you did what had to be done for _both_ of you."

"I don't know if …"

"You're right. House_ is _a child and he's not going to grow up if everyone lets him get away with murder." Wilson pulled her closer again. Cuddy relaxed and leaned against him. She needed to hear words of comfort more than anything right now. Anything to alleviate the heartache. "You're the only one who can make him see that because you're the only one who matters to him."

"He said he chose me over being a better doctor." Cuddy mumbled.

"Brutally honest."

"It _was_ brutal." Cuddy conceded.

Julia hadn't said a word the entire time the pair talked. Her face was wet with tears for her sister in pain. "Do you think he can ever grow up?" She asked them both.

Cuddy was silent. Wilson hesitated. "Maybe."

_**

* * *

Readers, what do you think? Will House ever grow up emotionally? Will he ever recover from his damaged childhood? Let me know your thoughts in your reviews. Thanks for reading!**_


	3. The Walking Wounded

_"He said he chose me over being a better doctor." Cuddy mumbled._

_"Brutally honest."_

_"It was brutal." Cuddy conceded. _

_Julia hadn't said a word the entire time the pair talked. Her face was wet with tears for her sister in pain. "Do you think he can ever grow up?" She asked them both._

_Cuddy was silent. Wilson hesitated. "Maybe."_

**Ch. 3 Wounded**

Wilson felt miserable for his friends, Cuddy and House. Cuddy was obviously taking this badly. It was yet to be seen how House was handling the situation. Where the hell was he?

House knew how to disappear when he wanted to. Wilson dug his cell phone out of his jacket pocket and called Dr. Nolan.

_Hours earlier_

Cuddy had walked out on him. She had left him and he couldn't move. He should have chased her down, grabbed her, begged her, refused to let her leave him but he lnew it was pointless. She had decided he wasn't worth it anymore. Just like everyone else. Stacey, Wilson, countless bosses, his professors, his mother, his father…. She hadn't even called him. But then, why would she?

House got up and stared at himself in the bathroom mirror. He took a long hard look at himself. It was there. Self-loathing. Staring back and smiling mockingly.

He pushed himself away and grabbed the vicodin bottle off the sink shelf and popped it open. Two pills sprinkled into his outstretched hand. He slid them into his mouth and swallowed hard. Time to go.

He'd checked in under an alias. Wilson would try to track him down, Cuddy wouldn't. Once in his room, he dialed her home number. It was busy. He tried Cuddy's cell but it went straight to voicemail. The sound of her voice message cut into him so deeply that he couldn't swallow. He hung up before the beep. She'd know he called but what did it matter. He knew she'd never call him back.

It was over. It was his fault and he knew it. She was too smart to let him slide. It's what he loved about her. She was equal to him in every way except weakness. There, she bested him. She didn't do anything to deserve this and his own guilt was becoming overwhelming. He popped open the prescription bottle with the 2009 date on it. Two more pills. He was back. On drugs.

He crawled on the hotel bed and sank into the overly soft mattress. He stared at the wall seeing _her_ face, the tearful eyes, the trembling lips that told him goodbye. Why did he push her to the limit? Why did he do that to everyone? Wilson had left him, too. But he had come back after a while. Maybe Cuddy would….no, she was too disappointed by him. It was different when you were physically intimate with a woman. She had opened her body, mind and soul to him. It was literal. With Wilson, it was figurative. It didn't compare. Like reading about swimming versus actually drowning.

He would have prayed for sleep if he thought it would have helped. It never did. Not back when he was a child making deals with God, asking for a brief break from the raging man not his real father but whom he lived with. His mother had done nothing to interfere that he could tell other than try to distract his dad from going after him. She never acknowledged the hell that was his childhood. Why did she pretend so much? Why did he? Survival?

He closed his eyes and tried to remember the happier times with her. With his love. Cuddy's neck, her eyes, her lips, her smile. It hurt so bad she'd never look at him the same again.

Wilson was exhausted. He had circulated the route House use to travel back in his drugged-out days. No sign of him at the open-early bars, the greasy diners. He even called area hospitals to find out if there had been any motorcycle accidents. Wilson couldn't bring himself to call the police or the morgue. Instead he went to House's office in the early evening and hacked into House's laptop to track his credit card usage. It was right there. Radisson Inn. 9:40 am. He had gone to a hotel and locked himself away. No surprise.

Wilson ran out of the office. He raced to his car and drove as fast as he could to the Radisson in downtown Princeton. He dialed House's cell phone too many times to count and left several short messages. He was torn between calling him again and waiting for House to return the call but it never came.

In fifteen minutes, Wilson slammed his transmission into park and ran for the hotel door.

"Hey!"

Wilson recognized the voice. It came from above. He stopped short and looked up and gasped. House was standing on the rail of a balcony grinning at him. Wilson sucked his breath in and waited. Was House going to jump? Kill himself in front of Wilson in the next few seconds?

"Hey, House!" Wilson managed to squeak out loud.

"I knew you'd come."

"Don't I always?"

"No," House shook his head, still grinning.

"Get down. I'm coming up." Wilson tried to sound blase.

"I don't think so!" House bantered.

"Seriously, get down. You're making me dizzy." Wilson was more annoyed than worried until House leaned forward and jumped. Wilson's jaw dropped. "NOOOOOO!"

Wilson was paralyzed on the sidewalk. He couldn't move that is until he heard the splash, then nothing could stop him. Wilson raced around the tall white wall and came nose to nose with an wrought-iron fence's sign, 'Swimming Pool is for Hotel Guests Only.'

He closed his eyes and fought the urge to break the gate door down. When he opened his eyes he saw the familiar cruel, broad smile on House's soaked face.

"You thought I'd kill myself?" House laughed. "Really? Cuddy's not the only fish in the sea, look at 'em! They're everywhere!" House gestured with a beer bottle in his hand placed there by a very attractive brunette. Wilson glanced around and realized there were several women and men in the pool hooting and hollering at House's stupid stunt as if it was the coolest thing they'd ever witnesses.

"Join us, Jimmy boy. The water's perfect."

"Go to HELL!"

"Been there and back. This place is better!" Wilson barely heard House's taunt as he stormed off to his car. House was an ass who enjoyed hurting those who cared about him. He took things too far. No filter. No understanding of human limits. Cuddy _was _better off without him.

An hour later Wilson's cell phone buzzed against his thigh. He pulled it out hoping it was Cuddy. It wasn't. House was calling him.

"What!" Wilson snapped.

"Hey, hey, hey. Lighten up. How was I suppose to know you'd arrive when you did?"

"You fucking jumped off a fifth floor balcony! I thought I was watching you kill yourself, you asshole!"

"Jimmy, calm down. You'll give yourself an aneurysm," House chided him. "Don't worry about me, I'm fine. I just had to ….escape for a little while."

"Are you high?"

"Not really."

"But you were when you jumped. Don't lie to me." Wilson was mad.

"Does it matter?" House toyed with him.

"Good night."

"Wait…."

Wilson waited for House to resume talking. "What?" He heard House moving around after a knock on the door over the phone. "Who's that?"

"It's room-service," House said quickly. "Look I got go,…"

"I thought you said it was room service?" Wilson sounded confused.

"Not that kind of room service." House said quickly before hanging up. Wilson stared at the phone in his hand hoping it wasn't a hooker.

House let the hooker in. She was everything Cuddy wasn't. Crass, tatted on both arms in that dull grey ink that said I have shit for brains and lousy judgement. She was a fake blonde, busty and dressed slutty. Perfect for helping him forget _her._ The woman strutted in, took a quick look at his hotel room and gave him a smile.

"Turn around, slowly." House said. 'Tiffany' did as she was told. "See anything you like?" Tiffany asked flirtatiously.

"What's not to like?" House said sarcastically. "Take off your clothes.

Once Tiffany left, House lay perfectly still staring at the hotel ceiling. He thought about what had just happened. As if sex with a stranger would have worked. Instead he felt nasty. He knew from the beginning this day would come with Cuddy. Hell, he had practically planned. Self-sabotage was one of his finer abilities. He had no one to blame but himself.

She was right, of course. House had relapsed and taken Vicodin to numb the pain...no, the fear of pain. The pain that would hit him like an icepick in his brain when he'd see the end in her eyes. The cancer would be there and he wouldn't be able to save her. Him, the boy wonder medical genius powerless when it mattered the most.

How ironic. Fall in love with a woman, leave her, spend the next twenty years trying to forget her, then find her again and fight off the attraction until he couldn't stand it and had to tell her he wanted her. By then she's engaged to an ex-friend. But she came through for him time and time again. This time she threw away a chance at marriage with a decent guy, just for him. And what had he done for her? Sure, they were happy for a while and it would have stayed like that as long as nothing too scary had come along but it did. Life threw another shitty curve ball at him.

What did it matter now? Cuddy didn't want him anymore. He wasn't good enough for her. She said that to his face. He couldn't argue with the truth. He hadn't deserved her and as usual, he screwed it up. House reached over and grabbed his cell phone off the side table.

He hit #7 and waited. The phone speed-dialed an important number. It was late so he didn't expect anyone to answer and sighed with some relief to hear the recorded message. Finally, the beep came and he left a short message. House set the phone down on the bed and rolled away to fall asleep but his brain was spinning. "No rest for the wicked," House murmured to himself.

_**For those of you following this story, please be sure to re-read Chapter one. I didn't realize I had posted an incomplete version instead of a re-edited final version. I changed some things so it might be confusing to you if you missed reading the revised chapter. And as always, thanks for reading. Reviews make me update new chapters so much faster. I love everyone's ideas and will incorporate them as the story grows. Appreciate all the comments!**_


	4. Post Traumatic Shock Disorder?

_What did it matter now? Cuddy didn't want him anymore. He wasn't good enough for her. She said that to his face. He couldn't argue with the truth. He hadn't deserved her and as usual, he screwed it up. House reached over and grabbed his cell phone off the side table. _

_He hit #7 and waited. The phone speed-dialed an important number. It was late so he didn't expect anyone to answer and sighed with some relief to hear the recorded message. Finally, the beep came and he left a short message. House set the phone down on the bed and rolled away to fall asleep but his brain was spinning. "No rest for the wicked," House murmured to himself._

**Ch. 4. Post Traumatic Stress Disorder**

It ate at him. His friend was falling back into his old destructive behaviors. Vicodin, hookers, what was next? Hallucinations? Wilson got up and went into the kitchen, poured himself a stiff shot of bourbon and downed it.

He checked his watch. It was after nine, not too late to call Cuddy. Maybe he'd just go see her and check on her medically, that excuse would work. No way was he going to bring up what he saw and heard from House. Wilson decided he'd keep it to himself for Cuddy's sake.

* * *

Marina's car was long gone, so was Julia's, that meant Cuddy was alone. Wilson knocked gently on the door hoping he wouldn't wake Rachel. He waited, figuring it would take Cuddy extra time to move to the door. Finally it opened and Cuddy stood there looking tired and small.

"Wilson? Something wrong?" Ever the consumate Dean of Medicine, Cuddy ignored the obvious elephant's cane in the room.

"No, everything's fine. I just came by to check on you and see how you're doing."

"Oh."

"Can I come in?"

"Of course," Cuddy stepped back and feigned a weak smile. "Julia left a little while ago after putting Rachel to bed for me."

"Why doesn't she just stay here?" Wilson asked as he removed his coat and sat on the sofa.

"She has kids of her own…"

"Yeah but its a long drive."

"Maybe I should just go with her and recover there," Cuddy wondered aloud.

"That's not a bad idea," Wilson said quietly.

"So why are you really here?" Cuddy knew this was not about her surgical stitches or bandage changes. Not at 9:30 at night.

"I told you I wanted to see how you were doing."

"You saw House, didn't you." Cuddy looked like she might cry but swallowed hard and fought to keep her composure.

Wilson nodded and looked guilty.

"And?"

"He's House. What more can I say." Wilson began to fidget with his hands. Cuddy reached over and patted them still.

"Does he hate me?"

"He couldn't hate you. If anything, he hates himself."

"What about vicodin? Is he taking them or …." She let her voice trail off.

"I think he's still taking them judging by how he sounds." Cuddy knew what that meant.

"Well, guess he's not exactly suffering then," Cuddy bit her lip at the unintended sarcasm.

"We both know that's not true...I mean he's taking the pills so he won't feel …"

"Exactly." Cuddy stared hard into Wilson's eyes. "So you gonna check my bandages or just sit there?" Wilson realized Cuddy couldn't take hearing anymore.

Wilson nodded and they shifted positions until Cuddy was stretched out a little and her clothing moved away from her bandage. "Looks like its healing just fine, stitches are good. Does it hurt when I touch the area?"

Cuddy shook her head no. "Liar, you're sore. Do you want your pain meds?" Cuddy laughed at Wilson's ironic words.

"I don't need them. I'm fine," Cuddy said through gritted teeth.

"Take the damn pain meds, Lisa. You had surgery for Godsake!" Wilson was annoyed at her need to refuse the medication. "I've got to change the bandage and its gonna hurt so please just take something to keep me from hurting you?"

Cuddy gave in and told him where to find her bottle of pain pills in her bathroom. "Let me help you get to bed," Wilson suggested. Cuddy shook her head.

"I'm not going to make a move on you if that's what you're thinking," Wilson said sarcastically.

"Oh James!" Cuddy chided. "I know you wouldn't do that."

"Besides, House would kill me if he thought for one moment I took advantage of you," Wilson said before he realized what was happening. Cuddy sort of gasped.

"Oh shit, I'm sorry." Wilson explained right away. "Forget I said that."

"Forget it, James. I know what you meant." Cuddy took his arm and he walked her slowly to her room.

Within a few minutes Cuddy had swallowed a pain pill and Wilson had redressed her incision taking care to cleanse it gently. A clean bandage was applied and Wilson tugged her shirt down over it before helping her to roll over on her back. "It hurts less if you sleep on it, the pressure …."

"I knowwwww, I'm still a doctor, James," Cuddy said a little sharply. "Would you mind checking on Rachel for me?"

"Yeah, sure. I'll be right back.

Cuddy laid in her bed ignoring the fact she was on House's side of the bed. She would ask Wilson to move her clock to this side and bring her cell phone to her. He was a good friend to her and to House. If anything he was their chief cheerleader and number one supporter. That would have to change, she thought.

"Rachel's asleep and adorable," Wilson said as he re-entered her room. "You gonna be okay?"

Cuddy looked up at James Wilson's big brown eyes and arched furry eyebrows. "What choice do I have?"

"I take that as a 'yes'?" Wilson sat on the side of her bed and patted her hand. "House is, was and always will be an ass. He can't help it. It's who he is. But deep inside he wants to be better, especially for you."

"James, stop it. I know House, too. He wants a lot of things but he's not willing to change and its not fair to ask him to...not when he can't…" Cuddy hesitated but Wilson headed off the conversation into a different direction.

"We're not talking about a congenital defect in his brain, Lisa. We're talking about a man who grew up in Hell, a war-zone inside a home, a man who lost all ability to see his own worth and who's been seeking the same level of dysfunction to merit his self-destructive ways," Wilson stopped speaking and stared at her as if he just had an epiphany Housian-style.

"What?" Cuddy recognized the break-through moment. "What is it?"

"It's not his fault…"

"I never said it was." Cuddy interjected.

"No, no. I mean it's literally not his fault. He's been wounded for so long he's come to believe that's what normal is. But it's not. It's like he's gone undiagnosed for Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder since childhood. It totally fits!" Wilson's eyes were huge with recognition. It explains the erratic behaviors, the risk taking, the self-loathing, the drugs...it makes sense."

Cuddy thought about it, turning the concept over in her mind. "What do you know about his childhood?…."

"Hardly anything but I know he hated his father, or the guy he thought was his father. He wouldn't talk about it but I gather the man beat him and abused him mentally." Wilson said quietly. Cuddy grasped Wilson's hand and squeezed it reassuringly. Her eyes filled with tears at the thought of anyone harming a child, especially House as a small boy.

Cuddy somehow felt better at the possibility House's inability to relate might have been more about nurture than nature. She swallowed back her tears and ignored the lump in her throat. "He's a lot stronger than he thinks he is, just surviving a childhood like that. Where the hell was his mother? Did she abuse him, too?"

"I don't think so," Wilson said. "From what I saw at his father's funeral, Blythe House was completely' checked out,' in denial or some sort of pretend world. House told me his mother had an affair when his father was on assignment. She got pregnant with House and her husband figured out the baby wasn't his. The man tortured House to make her pay for her adultery. No way she didn't know."

"Oh God," Cuddy gasped. "No wonder he never wanted to be around them."

"He said she'd intervene now and then but I don't think his dad was overt about the physical abuse. But how could she not know?" Wilson seemed angry. "House needs to see someone about this. Dr. Nolan might know of a psychiatrist specializing in PTSD."

"You think you could get House to see someone, to talk about it?

"I don't know, but what choice do I have?" Wilson said using Cuddy's earlier words. "He's got to get past the walls he built around himself. Let me handle this for now. You just focus on getting better and getting back to work. We need you."

Wilson leaned in and kissed her on the cheek. Cuddy smiled at him. Wilson was a good friend.

"Thank you for taking care of us,...me, I mean."

"Call me if you need anything, okay?" Wilson smiled back. "Go to sleep. I'll lock up on my way out."

"Wait." Cuddy had to ask one final question. Wilson stopped and looked concerned.

"Breaking up with House. Did I ...do the wrong thing?" Cuddy asked sadly.

"I don't know, Lisa," Wilson struggled within himself. "I know going back to vicodin was the worst thing for him. You didn't do that to him, he did. He chose it to cope and that tells me there's something wrong much deeper inside his head and heart. If you hadn't left, you'd have enabled his addiction. One way or another, House has to face up to his demons or he'll never be truly happy."

Cuddy felt guilt and pain flooding her body. She stifled a sob but Wilson heard it.

"You did the right thing, Lisa. You stood up to him and he needs that from you. You've saved his ass in so many different ways. In a way, you're exactly the type of mother he needed as a boy. Someone who won't tolerate abuse of any kind. I think that's part of his attraction to you."

"I don't want to be his mother!" Cuddy cried. "I just wanted him to be whole, like he was before he lost his leg."

"That's guilt speaking. You didn't do that to him. You saved him even then. He wanted to die after the infarction. Stacey wanted to cut his leg off. You found a way to keep him whole." Wilson leaned over Cuddy and held her shoulders. "Look at me. You did the hardest thing anyone could do, you let him go. He needs to find his way back and neither one of us can do that for him. He'll be okay. I'll make sure of that. Sometimes I think you and I are really the parents he needed." Cuddy smiled at the thought of Wilson being the kindhearted father House should have had.

"That makes us his family?" Cuddy smiled through a few tears.

"Yeah, I guess we are," Wilson laughed. "And Rachel's his kid sister!"

Cuddy's smile disappeared at the thought of Rachel wondering where House was now that they broke up.

"Don't worry. I'll keep an eye on him and make sure he doesn't do anything too extreme. If he does, we can always hold an intervention!" Wilson grinned.

Cuddy laughed at the thought of House's reaction to such an action. "Please watch over him. I still love him but I just can't watch him hurt himself."

"I know and he loves you. I've never been more sure of anything in my life," Wilson said firmly. He had sat back on her bed next to Cuddy. "We'll keep our parenting roles to ourselves. The last thing House needs to know right now is we're teaching him anything!" Cuddy smiled and nodded. "I'm not going to let him bully his way out of this. No more letting him off the hook. I promise you, I will get to the bottom of his messed up psyche and we'll drag it kicking and screaming into the daylight. One way or another, House is going to face up to his past or he's not going to have much of a future."

Cuddy swallowed hard. Her eyes were tear-filled. "Thank you for being such a good friend."

"Us parental units have to stick together!" Wilson joked. "So, 'good night, honey.'" Wilson said with air-quotes.

"Good-night, dear," Cuddy replied. "Maybe we should have a secret handshake, too?"

"I'll work on it!" Wilson leaned forward and kissed her on the cheek just as Cuddy grabbed him in a hug.

"Thank you," Cuddy whispered in his ear.

"House has no idea what he's up against," Wilson whispered back. Cuddy smiled. It felt good to have hope. She let Wilson go and he stood up. "See you tomorrow, Lisa," James said warmly as he turned off her bedside lamp. Cuddy could hear Wilson's footsteps for a few seconds and held her breathe until she heard the front door close. She closed her eyes and prayed for a miracle.

_**Hope you like the direction of this story. I do think there's hope for us Huddies. Don't forget how horrible and angsty season six was with the Luddy Arc! Besides, isn't Hollywood's standard plot device that boy gets girl, boy loses girl, boy gets girl back? I'm backing on that successful device and the fact that David Shore said people don't change, they just reveal more of themselves, peeling back the layers like an onion (oh god, Shore watches too much Shreck!) We know Cuddy and Wilson care deeply about House and can see the good in him. They just need him to see the good in him and help him get past his self-destructive ways. That said, I hope you like what happens next!**_


	5. Richochet

_"House has no idea what he's up against," Wilson whispered back. Cuddy smiled. It felt good to have hope. She let Wilson go and he stood up. "See you tomorrow, Lisa," James said warmly as he turned off her bedside lamp. Cuddy could hear Wilson's footsteps for a few seconds and held her breathe until she heard the front door close. She closed her eyes and prayed for a miracle._

**Ch.5 Richochet**

Foreman replayed the voicemail twice to be certain. House had left him a message late the night before. And after listening to it again, he couldn't shake the feeling something was off - well make that _more off_ than usual with House. Foreman frowned and called Chase and Taub to relay the message. Then he called Wilson.

**xyxyxyxyxyxyx**

Wilson hung up after listening to Foreman's concerns. Whatever was brewing, Wilson knew Foreman would keep him apprised. Wilson rejected the urge to call Cuddy either to check on her or find out if she knew anything about the cryptic message Foreman had received. Instead, he refilled his coffee travel mug, turned off the coffee maker and grabbed his coat and keys. He'd get to the bottom of this soon enough he thought with a sigh.

**xyxyxyxyxyxyx**

House stared at the dark-haired Dominika as she got dressed by the foot of his bed. She reminded him of Cuddy. Well, except that Dominika was several inches taller, about fifteen years younger and, oh yeah, she was a prostitute. A prostitute who needed a green-card. Fast.

House watched the young woman slip on her lingerie and didn't smile back at her as she smiled flirtatiously at him, assuming his stare was based on lust or stupidity. She knew men and this one wasn't much different from the others. Except that he was reckless and sad. That didn't matter. It suited her needs.

They had an appointment in just a half an hour with House's staff.

**xyxyxyxyxyxyx**

"Everyone, this is Dominika. We're getting married this Friday," House said matter-of-factly to his stunned team's faces. Taub's mouth dropped open. House wasn't sure if it was the news or the lust Taub most surely felt at the exquisitely curvy Polish young woman.

Masters' face was a frenzy of seething anger and disgust at House's announcement. He could read her feelings easily as she worked furiously to stop herself from speaking. Chase looked innocently confused momentarily but sat back and enjoyed the show.

Foreman. Well, what could anyone expect? Foreman raised a single eyebrow in mock sarcasm. Foreman had long ago gotten past the shock value of House's daily antics. Still, Foreman knew House was reacting badly to being dumped by Cuddy for _being _House to the nth degree. He understood Cuddy better for it and had hoped it wouldn't come to this but House's latest news only confirmed his respect for Cuddy's judgement and decisiveness in leaving this shell of a man.

"Congratulations," Foreman said dryly. Masters' head swiveled quickly to glare at Foreman who glanced at her without a word, conveying a calmness in the eye of the storm that Masters quickly noted. Taub was speechless. Chase was not.

Chase rose from the table and stuck his hand out to shake House's hand and then Dominika's hand. "Congratulations to both of you. I'm sure it was love at first sight." To Dominika, it sounded sincere but House knew better.

"Zank que," Dominika replied with a smile. Chase's hand was soft and warm in his hers.

"Down boy, don't start that Aussie flirty crap!" House grinned knowingly at the young man. Dominika did take notice of Chase's attractiveness and the accent was sexy. "Watch out for him, he's all hands," House warned Dominika in a loud whisper.

Taub recovered enough to nod at the newly engaged couple and also congratulate them. Masters remained silent.

"Well, that's everything. Just thought you should know. Oh, and I'd like for the three of you to stand with me at the ceremony sorta like 'best men.' Masters, sorry, but you're a girl.

"Whatever." Masters said without taking her eyes off the folder in front of her. "We have a patient…."

House cut her off. "So, my apartment, Friday night. Dress up guys. Suits, ties, the whole shebang. Masters, you're invited too. Be there by 7 and don't be late."

"Wouldn't miss it for the world," Masters said in a flat tone. _What kind of psychotic break is this?_ She asked herself.

"Great. Dominika and I have to go pick out rings so I'll be back later," House smiled as he led his fiancee out of the DDX room and into the hall leaving the team in utter silence.

Masters slumped back in her chair and stared at Taub. Taub shook his head back and forth slowly to signify his surprise. Foreman glanced down and sighed before looking back at the team.

"What? Chase asked him. "Our crazy-ass, fearless leader is getting married. To the wrong woman, granted, but is anyone really that surprised?"

"YES!" Masters practically shouted at Chase. "What the hell is wrong with House?"

"What isn't?" Foreman replied dryly.

"You guys act like this is normal? He only just broke up with Cuddy a ...a...few days ago and now he's getting married? To a ...a…"

"A hooker?" Taub finished her statement.

"Is she?" Masters hoped he was wrong.

Chase leaned forward. "Its gotta be for a green-card. You heard her accent? Slavic I'm guessing."

Foreman leaned back in his chair, crossed his arms and rubbed his chin in thought. "Probably."

Masters said what had to be said. "This will kill Cuddy. Do you think House is doing this just to hurt her for breaking up with him?"

Taub raised an eyebrow sarcastically. "D'uh. Of course."

"And for the sex," Chase added. "Dominika is pretty hot. Reminds me of someone."

"Yeah, Cuddy." Foreman and Masters said simultaneously. They glanced at each other surprised at the outburst.

Foreman got up and nodded to the case folders in front of everyone. "Read the case file, again. I'll be back in a few minutes."

**xyxyxyxyxyxyx**

"You're kidding, of course." Wilson demanded of House. Foreman hadn't wasted any time informing Wilson of House's sudden announcement. Wilson had stopped by House's office several times hoping to catch him there. House hadn't returned until well after lunch.

"No, I'm not." House said peering over his reading glasses. He was studying a case file when Wilson bursted in to his office that afternoon.

"I can't believe you'd do this to her!" Wilson blasted House.

"And by 'her' you mean 'Cuddy,'" House said evenly.

"Of course I mean Cuddy!" Wilson wanted to scream but worked hard to keep himself in control. "This is you lashing out at the world, just more of your self-destructive behavior designed to push everyone away that matters. And it's working, House! Do you hear me?" Wilson's face was red.

House stared at his only friend. "How can I not hear you. And stop yelling at me."

"First you jump off a goddamn balcony and practically kill yourself just to feel something inside that hard, hollow heart of yours and now you jump into a quickie marriage? Why?"

"Why not?" House said calmly.

"You need help, House." House ignored Wilson's remark.

"You're invited to the nuptials. Cuddy, too. Seven pm, Friday evening at my place. And bring a big expensive present. Dominika likes expensive things."

"This is bad, ...even for you," Wilson said quietly. "I don't believe you're going to go through with it. This is some sort of sick joke.. another one of your stupid games. You don't even believe in marriage!"

"I finally found the right woman," House said arrogantly.

"I can't believe you'd do this to Lisa. She loves you and you still love her."

"As evidenced by her dumping me," House stared at Wilson.

"Because you took vicodin!" Wilson exploded.

"I thought she was dying," House said quietly. "I …" He stopped trying to explain himself.

"What can you possibly expect to gain from this?" Wilson was frustrated.

"A new beginning. That rodeo clown I saved last week said something that actually made sense when he knew his career was over. If you can't have what you love, find something else to love."

"That idiot rides enraged bulls!" Wilson stood before House's desk realizing he was trying to get through a brick wall. "Cuddy won't come to your stupid wedding."

"Yes, she will and so will you. You'll be there for her." House said almost smugly.

"This is wrong and you know it, House. Don't do it. You're hurting yourself and Cuddy. Punishing her for leaving you. Don't do this. Seriously." Wilson had to try to talk sense into House. "You're pummeling someone who isn't fighting back."

House looked down to his paperwork and refused to comment.

"You and I both know this is a big mistake. Don't do it, man."

"Friday. 7pm. And wear a suit," House replied. Wilson sighed in resignation and turned away.

"I don't understand you," Wilson said as he slammed open House's office door and stalked out.

"I know," House said to himself.

_**Hope you like the direction this is going. I'm working on some subplots of how to incorporate what's happening in the show and where I think it will go towards the finale. I hope you find this cathartic but I promise you a happier ending than those bastard writers on the show have hinted at. Stick with me and please send reviews to get faster updates. I love your feedback and ideas to influence the story. Thanks for reading!**_


	6. Time Bomb

**Dear readers, thank you for the feedback, the comments and ideas. So many good options to take this story forward! I reviewed House's director Greg Yaitanes' twitter comments tonight going back as far as October 2010 and realized now that the upcoming episode 17 "Fall from Grace" will likely be as bad as Huddies fear. Yaitaines pointed out that episode 17 would be the reason why House and Cuddy would not be back together by the end of season 7 because " one of them is….it's complicated." I take that to mean House **_**does**_** get married and this drives Cuddy away. ****If**** that does in fact play out, this story attempts to explain the "logic" behind these ridiculous events and tells us what happens behind the scenes of what we see on the screen. Don't worry, I'm still planning on a Huddy reunion. Stick with me.**

_"You and I both know this is a big mistake. Don't do it, man."_

_"Friday. 7pm. And wear a suit," House replied. Wilson sighed in resignation and turned away._

_"I don't understand you," Wilson said as he slammed open House's office door and stalked out._

_"I know," House said to himself._

**Ch. 6 Time Bomb**

Wilson called Cuddy to let her know he'd be stopping by on his way home. He hung up the desk phone and felt physically drained. How was he going to explain this mess to Cuddy. How would _she_ take it? He dreaded telling her but Wilson knew it would be worse if she heard it from House.

**Xyxyxyxyxyxyx**

House drove home slowly. No one would be there and he had no reason to hurry. He unlocked the door and walked in to the perfectly dark, silent and still apartment. He stood there enjoying the dark as if he was momentarily invisible.

Flipping on the wall light switch, House dropped his backpack on the sofa and sloughed off his coat. He let it fall to the floor as he continued over to the scotch bottle on the coffee table, sat down heavily and reached to re-use the glass from the night before. It was sticky but he didn't care. Pouring a significant amount into the tumbler and took a large swallow. It burned enough to feel good going down his tight throat.

_Why am I doing this ...to her? I needed her, I still do! I told her I needed her and she__** left **__me. Threw me away...like I wasn't worth anything. I said I could do better! She knows it. She just doesn't...doesn't what?_ House took another gulp of scotch. It burned the edges of his tongue and he enjoyed that.

The pain from his leg wasn't strong enough to warrant taking another vicodin but the pain in his heart was. He dug in his front pocket, pulled out the bottle and popped the lid off. He paused and look inside the plastic bottle, at least a dozen vicodin pills stared back at him.

"Fuck!" House yelled. He threw the bottle against the wall and pills scattered across the floor. "Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!" He was alone. Again.

**xyxyxyxyxyxyx**

"Cuddy, I have something to tell you and it's not good," Wilson said slowly. Cuddy stared into Wilson's eyes trying to read him as if she could prepare herself. Her expression showed her alarm.

Wilson realized he was scaring her. "House's fine. Well, no, actually, what I mean is he's alive, everyone's fine, this is just ….news " Wilson stumbled. Cuddy sighed with relief.

"About House." Cuddy wasn't asking.

"Uhmm, yeah."

"Come in, we might as well sit down for this," Cuddy said gesturing to the living room as she stepped away from the front door.

"Where's Rachel?" Wilson asked.

"Upstairs with Julia, she's giving her a bath since my back's still a bit sore," Cuddy said.

The pair entered the living room and Cuddy returned to her spot on the sofa. Wilson sat close enough that he reached over and took her hand in his.

"Oh god, Wilson. How bad is it?"

"It's bad, Lisa." Wilson said. "House is getting married."

"What?" Cuddy looked confused. She didn't yell or blow up. She just couldn't quite comprehend what she had heard.

"This Friday," Wilson added.

Cuddy's eyes grew large as his words sank in. "You're serious?"

"He introduced the woman to his team," Wilson said gravely.

"It's a joke, House would never get married!" Cuddy said with a sarcastic smile. "Seriously, Wilson. House is screwing with you...with both of us."

Wilson seemed stunned. It hadn't occurred to him that House was pranking him given all that had happened in the past few days. House's leap off the balcony had definitely thrown Wilson off-kilter.

"He jumped off a fifth floor balcony yesterday into a hotel pool!" Wilson blurted out. Cuddy stared at him as if he'd lost his mind. "I saw it myself! I really thought that stupid sonofabitch was trying to kill himself!"

Cuddy pulled her hand away from Wilson and stood up speechless.

"He's not hurt. Stupid, yes. Hurt, no."

"He is messing with both of us. He's…" Cuddy struggled to find the right words.

"He's depressed, Cuddy!" Wilson interjected. "House's isn't able to feel _anything _anymore. That's the only thing I can assume after watching the train wreck he's become. You should have seen him with…" Wilson stopped short of telling her about the hookers.

"With what?" Cuddy asked.

"With...me," Wilson bluffed. "We were at the bar and I tried to get him to talk about the break up and he walked away! He says he's fine but he's clearly _anything but_ fine!"

Cuddy watched Wilson closely. "So far, that's pretty standard behavior for House. Avoidance."

"I know. I told him he could move back in with me and he called me an egotist!" Wilson sputtered. "Now this ...this stupid thing he's doing, getting married is just to hurt …"

"Me?" Cuddy injected.

"Yeah," Wilson deflated a bit at the truth. "Cuddy, House hasn't been alone by himself for some time now. He had you in his life and now he's left all alone and can't handle it anymore."

"Did you meet her?" Cuddy asked. Wilson shook his head.

"She was gone by the time Foreman told me...which was just after House and this 'Dominika" left together," Wilson fumed.

"Dominika? Don't tell me she's a hooker!" Cuddy asked miserably.

"Who knows? With House anything is possible," Wilson felt like hell. The wry confidence had long passed from Cuddy's face during the conversation. She looked as sad as Wilson felt for her.

"Friday? _This_ Friday?" Cuddy asked. Wilson nodded. "I take it we're invited. No way House would want us to miss this."

"I don't think that's such a good idea, Cuddy," Wilson realized Cuddy was maintaining a brave front despite the intense hurt she was feeling.

"Why?"

"What if he actually does get married? How are you going to deal with that?"

"You forget, Wilson, House has hurt me plenty of times in the past. If he wants to run off and marry the first woman who'll have him, fine. It'll only prove I was right to break it off with him."

"HOLD ON!" Wilson felt his temper rising. "It's because YOU broke it off with him that he's spiraled out of control!"

"Hey! Hey! Hold it down, you two!" Julia raced into the room. "You'll wake Rachel!"

Cuddy's pale face caught Julia's attention and she quickly surveyed the two. "What's going on!"

Wilson looked at Cuddy and she glared at Wilson as if daring him to say anything.

"House is getting married on Friday," Wilson blurted out. Julia's mouth dropped open in shock.

"Wait. What?" Julia glanced back and forth between her sister and Wilson. "You've got to be joking!"

"That's what I said," Cuddy replied.

"I wish I were," Wilson said sadly.

"Lisa, is it true?" Julia couldn't believe what she was hearing. Cuddy shrugged. Julia stared at Wilson, "I fucking hate that guy! Lisa was right to dump him! He's an asshole. And you!" Julia pointed at Wilson. "Don't you dare try to lay this on my sister. If that ass 'spiraled out of control' its because he's a fucking drug addict!"

Cuddy suddenly felt her lips trembling. Julia quickly came to her side and embraced her. "If I ever see him, he's a dead man, Lisa."

Cuddy hugged her sister back. "I'll be fine. House is ...back on drugs. That's what addicts do. They get stoned and do stupid things. This wedding is proof of that!"

Wilson caught her eye and nodded his head understandingly. He couldn't blame her. He was House's friend but he was also Cuddy's friend, too. House was undoubtedly an ass, an ass in real trouble.

"We can drive there together," Wilson said.

"Where?" Julia interrupted. Cuddy readied herself for Julia's reaction and quietly explained House's invitation had been specifically extended to her and Wilson.

"You can't be serious about going to this psycho's wedding! He's just doing this to get back at you for leaving him, Lisa. Don't play his stupid game!" Julia insisted.

"He's not a psycho, he's an addict. It's not the same thing. Besides, I'll be fine," Cuddy replied. "I really doubt he'll actually get married but if he does, then that settles everything, doesn't it?" She made sense in a warped way that had Julia's attention. "And JUlia, don't even think of saying a word of this to Mom!" Cuddy demanded. Julia nodded despite herself.

Cuddy glanced at Wilson, "What time do we need to be there, Wilson?"

"The 'wedding' is at seven o'clock," Wilson said, as his fingers gestured air quotes.

"Fine, pick me up at 6:30, then?" Cuddy asked.

"Okay," Wilson walked over to her and hugged her tightly. "You're going to be okay, Lisa."

"I know, James." She gave him a strained tight lipped smile to convince herself more than anything. Wilson couldn't return the smile, his eyes spoke volumes.

"Good night, Lisa. I'm sorry I had to tell you this but I didn't want you to find out …"

"I know, thank you for looking out for me," Cuddy reassured him. "I'm glad you told me."

Wilson nodded and Julia escorted him to the door before pushing him outside and joining him on the stoop. Julia quietly closed the door behind herself to speak with Wilson quickly. "You still think its her fault?" Julia hissed.

"No, I don't. I realize that now." Wilson admitted. "But Cuddy's tough, she'll get through this."

"Don't you believe that for a minute, James. It's killing her!" Julia whispered back. "Why does he always have to hurt her?"

"It's not just her," Wilson confided. "It's just the way House's wired. He's pretty screwed up."

"I hope he does get married! Then he's somebody else's problem. Do me a favor and keep him the hell away from her at the wedding and at the hospital!" Julia demanded. "She needs to get on with her life and all he does is torture her.

"I'll do everything I can to protect her, but know this, House ..."

"Don't you even _try to_ make excuses for that bastard. He's an idiot and I'm so sick of his selfishness. Just keep him away, you got it?" Julia was in no mood to be denied. Wilson nodded grimly and walked away to his car. Julia hurried back inside to find Cuddy sitting forlornly on the sofa staring at the floor.

"He's not worth it, Lisa." Julia said as she slid next to her sister. "I know it hurts but just try to see this as a confirmation you were right to leave him."

Lisa looked at her sister and couldn't speak. It hurt to swallow. "I know but…" Julia shushed her.

"I'm staying here tonight, kiddo."

"You don't have to do that."

"You don't fool me, Lisa. I _know_ you. You'll feel guilty about his stupid behavior and blame yourself and before you know it you'll take him back and then he'll just find other ways to hurt you again and again."

Cuddy couldn't argue with Julia's logic. "If I hadn't left him, he wouldn't have…"

"He wouldn't have what? Gone back on drugs? He _already did that before _you broke up. He's fucked up. He's a broken, screwed up mess and I can't understand what you ever saw in him!" Julia countered.

"He's …" Cuddy took in a deep breath, "screwed up, alright. I knew that when I went into this relationship with him but I always thought he'd be there for me when things got tough. I really thought he'd step up for me...but he just can't …"

"House is a selfish ass and its time you heard it straight out. Wilson's too close to House to see what I see - the real damage House has done to you. Please don't let yourself get sucked back into his crazy world!" Julia was frustrated. "That's it, I'm getting us a bottle of wine. Don't move. Consider it medicinal!"

"Great, now _I've_ turned to alcohol to cope?" Cuddy teased weakly.

"It's hardly the hard stuff!" Julia yelled from the kitchen. She returned with two large wine glasses, the wine bottle opener and a bottle of red wine. Within a few quick seconds, she had poured two glasses of wine and was handing one to her sister.

"Here's to your new life!" Julia proposed a toast. "May it be drama-free, happy and full of life's joys!" Cuddy forced herself to clink her glass to Julia's and take a sip.

"You're going to be okay, Lisa," Julia added.

"I know. It's just really hard to see him falling so far from where he was." Cuddy nearly choked on her words. Her emotions were beginning to get the best of her and her stomach ached. She felt sick.

Julia pulled Cuddy closer to her and kept her arm around her sister's shoulder as they relaxed against the sofa cushions.

"Men, who fucking needs them!" Julia blurted out once more catching Cuddy off-guard in mid-swallow and causing her to laugh as red wine droplets flew out of her mouth and stained her lap. "Nice!" Cuddy said sarcastically. Julia grinned.

Cuddy smiled feebly despite her thoughts. _I will not cry. I will NOT cry for that ass._

**xyxyxyxyxyxyxyx**

Foreman put the video gun down and reached over the back of the sofa to pick up his cellphone. Glancing at the number on the screen he recognized the caller. "It's Wilson?"

"It's gotta be about House," Taub said as he continued shooting at the video targets.

"Hello?" Foreman answered. He listened for a few seconds and gestured to Taub to stop shooting. Taub tried to read the stony-faced neurologist's expression but it was pointless.

"Yeah, I do think he's serious," Foreman responded to Wilson. "But then again, it's House and he's capable of anything."

Taub was intrigued. He stared at Foreman who stared back while listening to Wilson. "Seriously?" Foreman said suddenly. "Alright. I'll call you if anything new happens." Wilson ended the call and Foreman hung up.

"What was that about?" Taub asked.

"Cuddy and Wilson are going to the wedding."

"No shit?" Taub was stunned. "This is not good."

"You think?" Foreman said sarcastically.

"He just wants to hurt her back," Taub countered. "Getting dumped hurts, it makes you crazy."

"Naw, this is goes much deeper than hurting Cuddy. House's trying to convince himself and everybody else he doesn't need her." Foreman leaned back and crossed his arms and brooded over the conversation. "Besides, you're getting divorced, not dumped!"

"That's the ultimate dump!" Taub reminded him."What else did Wilson say?"

"He asked me to keep tabs on House's actions until the wedding and keep him informed for Cuddy's protection.

"Protection?" Taub repeated.

"What would you call it?" Foreman asked. "House is capable of doing anything when he's hurting. Vicodin can't take the edge off this kind of pain. Cuddy doesn't deserve this freak show wedding…"

Taub couldn't stand it any longer. "You really think House is going to marry some hooker?"

"We don't _know_ she's a hooker, Taub."

"I _know_ a hooker when I _see_ one," Taub said confidently. Foreman frowned at him.

"House is messed up. This _whole thing_ is messed up. If he goes through with it…" Foreman couldn't finish and just shook his head.

"What should we do?" Taub asked.

"What _can_ we do? House is back to being a ticking time bomb. I say we just wait and see what happens."

"This sucks," Taub said flatly.

"Yeah, it does." Foreman shook his head. "All we can do is be ready for anything and everything."

"Mayyyyy-be Cuddy will kick him in the balls!" Taub fantasized out loud. "No, wait, she's already done that metaphorically."

"Don't blame Cuddy. Would you want to have to deal with someone like House 24/7?" Foreman asked.

"Good point. Either way, it's gonna be a bumpy night," Taub reasoned. Foreman nodded as he lifted his video control gun and shot back at the screen.

"Unpause the game, man," Foreman wasn't willing to dwell on this any longer. Whatever was going to happen was going to happen and he and the rest of the team had front row seats whether they liked it or not.

**yxyxyxyxyxxyxyx**

_**Let me know your thoughts and please keep the reviews coming! I'm thoroughly surprised at how much I actually care about these fictional characters and I'm plenty old enough to know better. Still I can't help but feel saddened by the direction of the show...for now. We will find a way to get Huddy back together, damn it! Reviews make me less crazy. Thanks.**_


	7. Battle Zone

**(Dear Readers, I just saw the four sneak peek spoilers for the March 21 episode #17 "Fall from Grace" and it appears House purposely and ****personally**** invites Cuddy himself, going so far as to hand her the invitation and telling her it's (just) a "thing" and "we'd love it if you'd drop by" so she'll be completely caught by surprise, hurt and shocked to find out it's a wedding! I seriously can't understand House's behavior, still, I'm sticking to my fanfic and having Cuddy aware in advance yet still intrigued to see if he actually goes through with getting married or not. In this story, Cuddy is hoping and believing it's a typical House prank ploy for attention and shock-value).**

_"Mayyyyy-be Cuddy will kick him in the balls!" Taub fantasized out loud. "No, wait, she's already done that metaphorically." _

_"Don't blame Cuddy. Would you want to have to deal with someone like House 24/7?" Foreman asked._

_"Good point. Either way, it's gonna be a bumpy night," Taub reasoned. Foreman nodded as he lifted his video control gun and shot back at the screen. _

_"Unpause the game, man," Foreman wasn't willing to dwell on this any longer. Whatever was going to happen was going to happen and he and the rest of the team had front row seats whether they liked it or not._

**yxyxyxyxyxxyxyx**

House knew from the hard loud knock it was a pissed-off Wilson on the other side of his door. "What?" House yelled.

"Open the door, House!" Wilson didn't care who heard him other than House.

"Hang on!" House needed time to get up from kneeling on the floor picking up the scattered vicodin pills. Wilson fumed outside.

House hobbled to the door, opened it and walked away presuming Wilson wasn't going to be leaving soon. Wilson said nothing and stormed in, even slamming the door behind him and startling House.

"Hey! What the hell's the matter with you?" House snapped at Wilson.

"That's what I came here to ask you!" Wilson snarled.

"Lemme guess, this is about my upcoming wedding?"

"No shit, Sherlock!" Wilson was in no mood to be toyed with. "Why. Are. You. Doing. This?"

House sat down heavily on his couch and thought about it.

"She makes me feel good."

"Bullshit!" Wilson stood in front of House and stared down at him.

"And _she_ wanted to get married."

"What, Cuddy didn't? Did you ever _ask _her?" Wilson demanded.

House stared silently at Wilson.

"Too afraid to even _ask her_, I thought so!" Wilson said angrily. He was torn up inside and couldn't believe just a week ago how happy he had been for his two closest friends and now it was as bad as things could be, short of death.

"_She_ left me, remember?"

"Because she realized she was the only adult in the relationship!"

The two men stared hard at each other. Wilson responded first. "You took vicodin, House. What did you expect her to do?" House looked away.

Wilson sat down in the chair opposite the sofa and waited. He wasn't leaving until House and he worked through it. House had other ideas.

"Have you asked her to give you a second chance?"

"How'd Cuddy take the news," House had to know.

"Stop deflecting, House. Answer me."

"You told her about Dominika and Friday. I can see it in your eyes. No other reason you'd be here this time of night and this angry," House smirked at his own sharp observations.

"Tell me about the vicodin, first."

"No dice," House stood up and walked to the door. He opened it and waited for Wilson to take the obvious hint to leave.

"You're a fool, House. You wrecking your last _real _chance at happiness. I don't know how you can look at yourself in the mirror and not sicken yourself."

"Practice, plenty of practice."

Wilson got up, sighed loudly in disgust and headed for the door. "I wish I could fix this for you but I can't. Not when you're like this." He stopped directly in front of House. "What do you expect to accomplish by hurting Cuddy?"

"This isn't about her, it's about me," House said arrogantly.

"Sure it is. You keep on telling yourself that." Wilson said through steely eyes before exiting the apartment. "You still love her. You wouldn't try to hurt her if you were over her!" Wilson snarked once he stepped into the hallway.

House slammed the door in Wilson's face.

**yxyxyxyxyxxyxyx**

Martha Masters sat fuming in the parking garage of Princeton Plainsboro Teaching Hospital. She hadn't slept well the night before, tossing and turning over the impending hurt headed Cuddy's way when she learns about House's quickie marriage.

If only Cuddy were back from her surgery recovery, Masters could casually stop in and let her know what House was planning. Masters couldn't believe she was working for a full-blown vicodin addict, much less a sadistic man with serious rejection issues. All she could hope for was for Cuddy to skip the 'wedding.'

Exiting her car, Masters nearly collided with Taub's volvo as he pulled in next to the parking space next to her car.

Taub hit the brakes and gestured his apologies. Masters nodded and waited for him. She had to talk to someone about House even if it was the lying, cheating, divorcing Taub.

"Hey, sorry about that!" Taub quipped as he got out of his car. " I didn't see you…."

"Forget about it," Masters waved it off. "I want to ask you something before we get in the office, gotta a minute?"

Taub cocked his head at her question but nodded. He grabbed his briefcase and locked his car before falling into step next to Masters. They headed for the garage elevators.

**Yxyxyxyxyxxyxyx**

"But he is so much older than you, Niki!" Tara whined. "Why would you marry him? You just met him!"

Dominika smiled at her roommate. "Hees _is _old, bot hees also reachhh and an American see-tizen," Dominika winked at her friend as she continued packing up some of her things into boxes in preparation to move them to House's apartment.

"I thought you weren't going to move in with him?" Tara asked.

"Of course I em movink in weet Gregory or et vouldn't luke right," Dominika stacked two boxes by her bed.

"I guess I'll still see you at work? I mean you're not quitting, right?"

"Eet depends on Gregory but I steel vant to ave my own mon-nay," Dominika sighed. "Don't vorry, eet is wot I must do, ok?" Tara didn't look very happy but she nodded.

**Yxyxyxyxyxxyxyx**

Cuddy stared at her bedroom ceiling. The incision on her back was nearly healed and she'd have to see House's stubbly face at work everyday - that is if he wasn't gone for a honeymoon. _Hey, House hasn't asked for time off for a honeymoon! _Lisa smiled to herself. She had put Wilson in charge while she was home recovering and _he_ hadn't mentioned anything about House needing time off.

It wasn't plausible that House would just up and marry somebody as a reaction to being dumped. Still, What would she do if House actually got married?

She held her breathe and let her mind race. There were really no options to consider. If he was getting married, it was game over for her and House. He'd be with someone else. She hadn't even thought that far when she broke it off with House. She knew he loved her and she loved him. She hadn't fallen out of love with him, she just couldn't be in a relationship with him if he was on drugs and he needed drugs to deal with the tough times. The times she'd need him the most.

Maybe this _was_ a stupid prank, _Besides, House would never get married to anyone, _she told herself_. _Cuddy felt a small measure of comfort momentarily until she realized_ if it were_ a prank, House most definitely would have made sure all details were covered, like requesting time off to make everyone believe it.

Unless...he didn't expect her to find out in advance. Wait. House told his team he was getting married. He knows his team would tell Wilson who would, of course, tell Cuddy!

Cuddy decided if House was actually getting married, it had to be purely about striking back at her for breaking up with him. No other reason made sense. House doesn't fall in love at the drop of a hat! Lust, yes, love, no. Cuddy's stomach felt terrible. She knew it was nothing more that raw unhappiness churning with fear and nearly as painful as the feeling in her heart.

_If this is a prank, he'll expect me to fall apart in front of everyone. If all he wants is to hurt and embarrass me then he can just go to Hell! _Cuddy decided. Still, a nagging thought in the back of her mind persisted until she faced it mentally.

_If House does get married, then...then… _Cuddy's mind went blank. She realized there was no Plan A or Plan B to file away in case she needed to react on the fly. There was just the plain realization:_ Then I will just have to accept it and move on. _

**Yxyxyxyxyxxyxyx**

**Friday morning:**

Julia looked in on Lisa but her bed was empty. "Lisa? Where are you?"

Cuddy poked her head out of the bathroom, her hair wet. "I'm up, I'm going in today."

"Do you actually feel well enough or is your curiosity driving you?" Julia said with a small smirk.

"I'm much better. No reason to stay home so long," Cuddy said. "I called Marina and let her know I needed her today. Would you mind watching Rachel until she gets here about 10 am?"

"Uh, yeah, sure."

"Thanks, Julia. You've been so good to me. I definitely owe you," Cuddy said with a smile. "Gotta dry my hair or I'll be late." Julia nodded and turned to go check on Rachel.

Cuddy wiped the fog off her bathroom mirror and stared at herself. She was tough. She could handle seeing House today. After all, she planned on seeing him this evening at his sham wedding. Besides, if he saw her, maybe he'd talk to her about their break-up and wouldn't actually go through with it. A girl can dream, right?

**xyxyxyxyxyxyxyyx**

Friday afternoon:

Dominika took a long, leisurely bath after giving herself a pedicure and manicure. She wanted to look lovely in her sexy wedding dress, an off-white cocktail dress in satin with beautiful detailing along the bodice. She thought about the flowers she picked up at the florist that morning and were now carefully packaged in a clear plastic box and awaiting her in the refrigerator.

Dominika elected to go with a lovely spray of white, fragrant flowers across a small band that would hold back her sleek brown hair. Veils were for churches. _This _would be a simple affair in Gregory's apartment with some sort of non-religious man officiating. Still, she had insisted on a small bouquet and candles for the private ceremony and Gregory had relented.

"In two years, I weel be free ...and an American citizen!" Dominka said aloud as she sipped a glass of champagne in her warm bath. She needed a little something to take the edge off the upcoming evening's significance.

**xyxyxyxyxyxyxyx**

House's extra special guest arrived earlier as he was instructed and knocked on the apartment door. It opened immediately.

"There you are! Get in!" House waved him in. He stepped into the apartment and stood there unsure what to do.

House took a long, thorough look at the man. This was someone Cuddy had once loved.

The man didn't know what to think when he got the call from the diagnostician but after they talked for a while, he was quite excited and thrilled to hear Dr. House was going to re-introduce him to Lisa Cuddy.

"This party's going to be a big night for Cuddy so I need you to pay attention to my signal. When you hear the music, that'll be your signal to come out of my room and come into the living room, got it?" House asked.

"Think she'll be surprised to see me after all this time?"

"Oh yeah," House grinned. "You have no idea."

**Extra thanks to those of you who took time to review and let me know your ideas about this story. The more reviews I get the more I know others out there care about Cuddy. If you're one of those who haven't yet given your opinion yet, pls take the time to write a review... don't leave me hanging! Thanks for reading.**


	8. Incoming!

**Dear Readers, thank you for all your great ideas and funny comments. We are quite a group of Huddy fans and Cuddy fans, too. I'm weaving in as much of the television show's episodes into the story along with a few additional ideas of my own to better flesh out the background. Like many of you, I was bothered greatly that House would go to such lengths to hurt Cuddy but I do feel his refusal to sleep with the bride was signs of his remorse at hurting Cuddy as well as the feeling he isn't moving on or even trying to. It's just a cover up as he tries to get Cuddy to blow up.**

_The man didn't know what to think when he got the call from the diagnostician but after they talked for a while, he was quite excited and thrilled to hear Dr. House was going to re-introduce him to Lisa Cuddy. _

_"This party's going to be a big night for Cuddy so I need you to pay attention to my signal. When you hear the music, that'll be your signal to come out of my room and come into the living room, got it?" House asked._

_"Think she'll be surprised to see me after all this time?"_

_"Oh yeah," House grinned. "You have no idea."_

**yxyxyxyxyxxyxyx**

House fell onto his bed and rubbed his arm across the place _she _use to lay beside him, right next to him. Wilson's accusation was right on target. _Of course I still love her. I also hate her for leaving me!_ House told himself. Why else would House go so far to hurt Cuddy? Who the hell gets married to some immigrant they just met? A dumb ass on the rebound, a drug addict who can't handle pain, a pathetic man who needed his life to suck _less._

He'd give anything if he could turn back time. Be the man he should have been to be for Cuddy, hell, for _any decent_ woman. You can't expect a woman facing a health crisis to sit alone in the hospital while her boy-toy hobbles around the hospital avoiding her bedside. What the fuck was wrong with him?

At least Dominika took his mind off things. She'd be there for him no matter what. She had to. She wanted her citizenship and marrying House was the solution. In exchange, House got a housemate willing to cook, clean and fuck. What wasn't to like? She didn't look like Cuddy but she wasn't far off. Dark hair, lithe, beautiful, playful. Granted her eyes weren't as doe-eyed or slanted or long lashed or even slate gray nor was her smile as brilliant as Lisa Cuddy's 20 pearly whites but she was a few years younger. That could help distract him.

At least by getting married, House knew Cuddy would finally know exactly what rejection felt like. And it would hurt. Bad.

**yxyxyxyxyxxyxy**

"I'm going to warn Dr. Cuddy," Masters told Taub. "It's not right what House is doing to her."

Taub wasn't surprised. _Moral _Masters would stick her nose into Cuddy's business but maybe she had a point. It was clear House wasn't in his right mind and all this drama was about House hurting Cuddy.

"I understand why you'd want to do that but it could …"

"Could what?" Masters asked quickly.

"It could be the wrong move."

"I can't let House blindside Dr. Cuddy! He just wants to hurt her because he's hurting!" Masters blurted. "What is it with you guys? You can't take rejection, you don't want commitment? What are we? Two different species? I swear men and women just make each other miserable!"

"Not always, but usually it ends up that way," Taub conceded.

"What the hell do men want?"

"Unconditional love," Taub shrugged. "Who doesn't?"

"Some people are just unlovable," Masters remarked.

"You're lovable," Taub reassured her.

"I'm not talking about me, Taub! I just can't stand the ...hurt...the anger, the ugliness between them."

"Cuddy's not even been back since her surgery," Taub pointed out.

"No, but it'll be there when she does return. Don't try to tell me it …"

"Holy shit! Shut up! Cuddy's headed this way right now!" Taub nodded in Cuddy's direction and Masters' jaw dropped momentarily.

"Dr. Cuddy, you're back! Isn't a little soon? You just had surgery," Masters said as Dr. Cuddy joined them at the garage elevator. The doors opened immediately as Cuddy approached. Masters was impressed.

"Elevator karma," Cuddy said as she smiled at Masters. "Dr. Taub, nice to see you."

"You, too, Dr. Cuddy. You look well."

"Thank you." The trio stepped into the elevator and Masters cleared her throat. Taub jabbed Masters in the ribs and shook his head as if to hint at her to not even bring it up until he was safely out of the elevator.

"Dr. Cuddy, I know you probably have a lot to deal with your first day back but could I have a few minutes with you right now?" Masters was insistant. Taub rolled his eyes.

"Uh, sure, can we talk while we walk?" Cuddy asked.

"Absolutely," Masters said as the women stepped out into the hospital lobby. Once the doors closed, Taub let out a big sigh of relief.

"So what did you want to talk about, Masters?" Cuddy asked the pale-faced young woman.

"It's about Dr. House," Masters admitted. Cuddy shook her head.

"I should have guessed. What's the problem?"

"Actually, it's about you and Dr. House." Cuddy stopped and turned to Masters.

"I know about Friday," Cuddy headed off Masters' next statement.

"You do?" Masters was shocked. "About him getting married?"

"Yes."

"And you're going to the ceremony?" Masters was incredible.

"I was invited."

"Did you know he invited you to _his _wedding? I mean, I didn't want you to find out when you got there," Masters confided. "I know Dr. House is not in his right mind and I'm concerned his behavior is a result of his drug use and the reason why you broke up…"

"Wait," Cuddy's hand flew up. "Lets finish this discussion in my office." Cuddy unlocked her office door, entered and hung up her jacket before going over to her desk. Masters stood by awkwardly.

"Have a seat, Masters," Cuddy gestured to the chairs in front of her desk. Masters took a seat quickly and waited for a cue to continue.

Cuddy took a seat and ignored the small jab she felt near the incision scar over her kidney. "What happened between myself and Dr. House is really not up for discussion," Cuddy said firmly yet kindly.

"I understand that but House is planning something to hurt you," Masters replied. "I can't understand why he's doing this!"

"Who knows why Dr. House does _what_ he does half the time," Cuddy admitted. "He's unpredictable, insensitive and …" Cuddy stopped herself from saying damaged. "...and hurt right now. You don't need to worry about him.."

Masters cut her off, "I'm not worried about Dr. House, I'm worried about you!" Masters gulped before continuing. "He's being intentionally cruel. He wants to hurt you with his wedding and I don't think you'd ever forgive him if he did this."

"Masters, I really appreciate your willingness to come forward and warn me, I really do. But Dr. House's behavior toward me is really nothing for you to worry about. I do appreciate that you warned me. I really do." Cuddy gave her a small, sad smile. Masters nodded her acceptance and moved to leave.

"If it's all the same to you, I may just skip the event. I can't stand to watch that kind of cruelty."

"Masters, it's alright. I've had plenty of experience dealing with Dr. House over the years. He rarely surprises me anymore," Cuddy insisted.

"Well, all right. Let me know if there's anything I can do to make things easier, okay?" Masters asked softly.

"Thank you for thinking of me, I appreciate it. Sincerely," Cuddy reassured her. "And thank you again for being so thoughtful. Let me know if there's anything you need from me, okay?"

Masters suddenly wanted to cry. She was shocked at the lump forming in her throat. This Dean of Medicine was far stronger than Masters had imagined. She was a bit in awe of Dr. Cuddy to begin with but this just sealed the deal.

"Dr. House has no idea what a big mistake he's making," Masters quipped. "If it were me, I'd kill any man who…"

"I'll be fine, Masters," Cutter interrupted her. "Thank you again."

Masters realized she had been dismissed politely and she took her cue to leave.

Cuddy rubbed her temples and closed her burning eyes. If someone like Masters was aware of what House was planning, then everyone in the hospital was aware. Cuddy would need to keep her composure now more than ever.

**Yxyxyxyxyxxyxyxy**

House rolled into Cuddy's office on his ridiculous segway. "I need a favor," He began as he dropped a blue folder on her desk disrespectfully.

"I need to add my fiance to my health insurance plan," House said matter-of-factly. Cuddy opened the folder to indeed see he had filled out the forms for her signature.

"Dominika wants to get a tooth capped before the wedding. I told her she was beautiful the way she is but…"

"No," Cuddy said firmly as she closed the folder and moved it further away from her on the desk.

"What, are you the moral arbiter of relationships?" House asked.

"I can't," Cuddy said clearly. "It's fraud."

"You covered Taub's wife for years," House countered.

Cuddy didn't respond. House burst out with some slavic expression and a dutiful Dominika entered the office carrying a tin paired with a sad, pouty face. She strode in and stood next to House.

Cuddy glanced down at her desk, licked her lips and waited for the misery to continue. She glanced back up to House's face.

"My love nugget thought we should do things they way their done in the old country by offering you a bribe." House pursued the matter, staring intently at Cuddy.

"Ees Almond Quecha," Dominka opened the tin and showed the contents to Cuddy. "I make with my own hands! Ees delicious!"

Cuddy accepted the tin graciously with a perfunctory yet fleeting smile before nodding to Dominika who stepped back and embraced House's left arm like a child.

"Fine," Cuddy said resignedly. "It's your life. You realize if I sign this and you do not get legally married, you'll no longer be covered by our health insurer.

"Okay," House replied. He watched Cuddy sitting there helplessly cornered, waiting for her to blow up. It never happened. His stomach sank.

Cuddy reopened the file, glanced over the form, signed it quickly, closed the folder and held it out to Dominika who quickly took it.

Cuddy smiled her best Dean of Medicine smile before adding, "I wish you both the best."

House felt disappointed. Cuddy had reacted calmly and without a sign of anger. He would have to go through with the wedding if things didn't change.

**xyxyxyxyxyxyxyxyx**

The guests began arriving just after 6:30 PM. House greeted several of them before Chase showed up.

"So you're really going to go through with this?" Chase had to ask. House wasn't the least bit nervous. What groom wasn't? Maybe one who didn't care?

"Why wouldn't I?" House said sarcastically. "You still doing the vows, right?"

"Of course," Chase answered calmly. Once Taub and Foreman arrived, Taub took to handling the door answering duties without being asked. He wanted more than anything to have some role in the 'show' even if it was ring bearer. He was sure it was a dig at his height but when was it not where House was concerned.

Eventually, Wilson and Cuddy arrived together. Taub didn't know what to say and neither did they. The pair stood in the back and waited and watched. Within a few minutes the room had filled up with guests and people were getting into position.

Cuddy refused to look at House. She knew her eyes would give away her hurt. Wilson couldn't help but stare at House hoping his best friend would come to his senses and announce the whole event was something other than a wedding.

But once the music started Wilson's hopes faded. His smile was gone and House's was growing. House stared at Cuddy as Dominika entered the room to the music of "Here comes the bride," Cuddy kept her eyes averted from his and carefully watched the bride.

Dominka was lovely. Her hair swept up, her bouquet elegant and simple, her dress was above the knee, beige, sleeveless and stunning. She looked like a bride. Cuddy kept her face stoic and emotionless. Wilson's heart sank as he watched Cuddy out of the corner of his eye.

_That bastard is actually getting married, _Wilson thought to himself._ What a sadistic fuck to do this to Cuddy! _Wilson turned to see House staring past Dominika and watching Cuddy with an intensity that scared Wilson.

Another man had entered the room at the sound of the music and was watching Cuddy closely. He started to move in her direction but stopped just as the music ended. He feared Cuddy's reaction might come during the momentary silence before the vows started and the last thing he wanted was to embarrass her.

House felt Wilson's attention and quickly looked back at Dominika just as Cuddy held her breathe silently. Dominika reached the end of the 'aisle' and stood before House and Chase. Chase asked her the standard wedding vows and she answered pleasantly with "I do."

House looked at Dominika for a split second before glancing to see Cuddy's reaction. Cuddy couldn't stand the thought of watching House take his vows with someone else. Cuddy glanced at the floor before turning and quickly walking out of the room and down the hall, past the man who had come to meet her again. She never saw him. She never saw anything but the haze before her as she strode calmly out of the room, her pace belying her inner feelings.

Once, out of his sight, Cuddy let her guard down and sighed sadly, her face overwrought with what was happening behind her. Glancing around for an escape, her fell on the door to the familiar bedroom she had shared with House for months.

There, coats of guests were piled neatly across the bed. She walked around the bed and sat on the side where she use to sleep with him. Pulling her knees up and hooking her heels on the sideboard, she was nearly fetal in position but it did little to help her feel less pained.

Wilson watched as House took his vows, stating an uninterested "yep" instead of "I do." Wilson stared at House who stared back with a flickering look of surprise at Cuddy's quick retreat. Wilson shook his head in disapproval and went to find Cuddy as the newly married couple stood for photos. He bumped into a man staring down the hallway where Cuddy had gone.

"Excuse me," Wilson said automatically. The man just nodded then turned to walk back toward the livingroom's festivities. House glanced up just in time to catch his eye giving him a questioning look. The man shook his head negatively, shrugged and waved. House nodded in response and watched the man leave with a frown.

Inside, House was actually pleased Cuddy hadn't run into this man. He was more than surprised that Cuddy had left in the middle of his vows and having her meet him would have been cruel after all. It was better this way. He still had this ace if he needed it.

A shadow at the bedroom door blocked the hall light briefly as Wilson followed Cuddy in and sat beside her on the bed. It was clear House had succeeded in wounding Cuddy deeply. This was the first crack in her professional demeanor Wilson had witnessed since her break up.

Wilson was at a loss of what to say but the exchange between them told him all he needed to know. Cuddy was hurt beyond anything else House had done to her in the past. "I promised myself I wasn't going to let it get to me," Cuddy said. "It got to me."

"Say the word and we're out that window," Wilson replied.

Cuddy smiled weakly. "I wouldn't give House the satisfaction."

"See things are getting back to normal," Wilson cajoled her gently.

"Yeah," Cuddy replied slowly. "Normal." She didn't sound too enthralled with that prospect.

"Come on, lets go," Wilson said as he slipped his arm through hers and waited for her to stand. Cuddy moved forward but stood for a second to look around the room she once spent many countless hours of happiness and bliss with the man she still loved.

"Well, I guess that's it," Cuddy said mostly to herself.

Wilson stayed silent. Cuddy swallowed hard and the pair left. She refused to look back one more time.

"Lets go see Rachel," Wilson suggested.

"Great idea," Cuddy forced herself to smile. The pair managed to slip out unnoticed from House's apartment. Cuddy's stomach felt horrible as if she might vomit at any moment. Everything had soured for her.

Within two hours, all the guests had left leaving Dominika to clean up a bit before plopping down on the sofa next to a very quiet House supposedly engrossed in some old movie on television. His eyes glassy as they stared straight ahead. He was rethinking the evening's events, replaying them in his mind. Rewatching Cuddy's reaction as if it were the film on the tv screen before him. He couldn't help but think fleetingly of the patient he had diagnosed. A monstrous murderer who had devoured 13 women. A monster scarred by a childhood of physical and psychological abuse

House felt a familiar fear flooding his chest. Internally scarred by the same type of childhood abuses, House attacked people closest to him with his selfish need to hurt back. He couldn't take the emotional pain like others managed to. And unlike the FBI-wanted serial killer, House had found a more acceptable means of attack; relying on psychological abuse like House was subjected to as a child. Clearly, from the scars on the patient/serial killer, that guy chose to attack by physical means just as he was subjected to as a child. Who burns a child with a cigarette over and over again? Who cuts scars into a kid? The killer was abused in ways House wasn't but both were monsters to some degree. He felt ashamed of himself.

At least the serial killer had been given a second chance at life by God after an overdose of heroin. Maybe House would get a second chance to fix things? Before he could finish the thought, Dominika, who had been watching the screen with him and laughing nervously at something in the movie, suddenly turned to House and spoke. "I know this is not a real marriage, but I like you."

"I like you, too," House said gently as he looked at her. Dominika leaned forward, cupped his face and kissed House tenderly but passionately. House allowed it briefly before turning his head away.

"I can't." House said flatly.

"Why?" Dominika was shocked.

"Because I don't sleep with married women," House said before getting up as quickly as he could. "You take the couch, I'm sleeping in there. Good night."

Dominika's surprise was written all over her face as she couldn't believe what she was hearing._ What just happened? _She thought.

**I did my best to recall the dialogue of the last episode so please forgive me if its not entirely accurate. After seeing the wedding episode, I decided to retract the role of the "secret special guest" from Cuddy's past for the time being but he will resurface in the story later on for good reason. Also, reviews make things better, easier to keep the motivation to update the story. I have some wild ideas to complete this story and I can only hope I'm on the same path as the show's writers who love to bring us to the depths of sadness before giving us a small light at the top of the well to shoot for. Thoughts? Ideas? Keep them coming.**


	9. foxholes

**Dear Readers, the message boards are filled with frustrated viewers and we are not alone. I've read every House' writers interviews trying to figure out what the heck is the direction and I've come up with my own theory which is being laid out in this story. I hope I'm right but even if I'm wrong, it feels pretty good to take the story in this direction. I'm hopeful that the Hollywood formula continues on from boy-loses-girl to boy-wins-girl back. Thank you to so many of you for the wonderful feedback. Reviews are so wonderful.**

_"I know this is not a real marriage, but I like you."_

_"I like you, too," House said gently as he looked at her. Dominika leaned forward, cupped his face and kissed House tenderly but passionately. House allowed it briefly before turning his head away._

_"I can't." House said flatly._

_"Why?" Dominika was shocked._

_"Because I don't sleep with married women," House said before getting up as quickly as he could. "You take the couch, I'm sleeping in there. Good night."_

_Dominika's surprise was written all over her face as she couldn't believe what she was hearing. What just happened? She thought._

**yxyxyxyxyxxyxyx**

The weekend helped to give Cuddy time to herself to deal with the aftermath of House's sudden marriage - to a complete stranger -just one week after Cuddy had broken up with House.

It was unbelievable and yet, not really. House was unpredictable, especially when he was hurt. No doubt about it, House's reaction to Cuddy ending their relationship was the sole motivation to his sudden marriage and he's need to hurt her _back._

Cuddy spent every available moment over the weekend enjoying time with Rachel. It took her mind off House and her aching heart. Only once did Rachel ask about House and Cuddy found herself momentarily speechless.

Wilson had made it a point to call Cuddy on Saturday and stopped by on Sunday. She let him know she'd be fine and for him to stop worrying about her. Wilson knew Cuddy was trying to be brave but he was also quite worried about House and secretly hoped she had news that might allay his own fears about House's impending crash-and-burn as was inevitable. Cuddy didn't volunteer any news .

Thankfully, House would be away for a few days on his "honeymoon" and that would help keep him out of sight and out of mind for both Cuddy and Wilson. Neither knew House had sent Dominika off to her own apartment while he went off on a road trip to locate Thirteen. The cover story was exactly what he needed.

**yxyxyxyxyxxyxy**

The team sat around for a several days without a case to keep them focused. Cuddy would surely expect them to work in the clinic until such a case could be found. Until then, they continued to sit around working on crossword puzzles, flirting with nurses and working on extreme suduko puzzles and shooting the breeze. Eventually boredom around the DDX table turned to conversation, speculation and concern.

"Why didn't you go to the wedding?" Taub asked Masters. She glared at him.

"Is that a rhetorical question?" Masters said bluntly.

"Not at all."

"Why did _you_ go?" Masters turned the tables. "Foreman, Chase why did you attend that cruel sham?

Foreman glanced up. "Why wouldn't I go?

"I thought you respected Cuddy?" Masters asked incredulously.

"I do," Foreman replied. "You gotta know by now House is a train wreck waiting to happen. Sometimes you gotta be present if you're going to help him stay on-track."

"I had to go!" Chase volunteered. "He asked me to conduct the ceremony."

"You could have said no!" Masters responded to Chase.

"Thata been a first," Foreman mumbled. Chase's head jerked at Foreman's comment.

"Jealous?" Chase teased.

"Where do you think House went on his honeymoon with Petroika?" Taub mused.

"Dominika," Chase corrected him.

"Who cares," Foreman said casually. "At least he's not here for a while and that's a good thing. Cuddy needs some space from that …"

"Idiot," Masters interjected. Taub grinned at her and went back to his crossword puzzle.

"Anyone seen Wilson?" Chase asked.

"Probably hovering around Cuddy," Taub said never taking his eyes of his newspaper puzzle.

"And what's with the stupid helicopter toys in the lobby yesterday?" Masters wasn't going to let it go. "Did you see him shoot missiles at her...in front of thise benefactors?" Masters was disgusted. "Cuddy really should fire him. He's an ass."

"She can be taught!" Chase teased her.

Foreman chuckled to himself. The others looked over at him. "How sad and messed up is _this _place when we're more freaked out by our boss' behavior than we are over treating a_ serial_ killer?" Foreman remarked. It silenced the group.

Masters' mouth dropped open momentarily before she closed it silently.

Chase glanced at Masters and then to Taub.

"I knew he was liar from the start," Taub pointed out. "You all wanted to give him a better life, sympathize just because he had scars, pressed your proverbial buttons..."

"The guy was horrendously abused as a kid," Chase defended himself. "That has to have an effect on the human mind! Just goes to prove what goes around, comes around."

Masters smiled to herself. Chase noticed. "What?" He asked her.

"I do hope you're right, what goes around comes around." Masters said flatly.

"You're defending the serial killer's actions?" Taub was surprised at Master's attitude.

"She's talking about House," Foreman surmised. Masters cocked an eyebrow at him and smiled more to herself as she cracked open her medical journal and began reading

The guys exchanged glances and let the topic die.

**Xyxyxyxyxyxyxyxyx**

Each time his cellphone vibrated, House would pull it out of his shirt pocket, glance at the screen hoping to see her name on the screen but it never was. Most of the calls came from Wilson who _would be_ the kind of guy who'd interrupt a man's supposed honeymoon.

Even Dominika called twice. House ignored them all and let the calls go to voicemail. He had things to do and needed time and space to think. Sitting behind the wheel gave him plenty of time to reconsider what he had done and what he was about to do.

The prison was just a couple of hours away.

**Xyxyxyxyxyxyxxy**

_Oh no,_ Cuddy thought,_ it can't be happening._ Standing before the bathroom mirror, Cuddy surveyed her pale face. She had thrown up two mornings in a row. She had read about the symptom but never personally experienced it in any of her previous attempts during IVF.

"I am not pregnant!" Cuddy told herself. She would verify this fact as soon as she could purchase a home pregnancy test. No, make that three test kits to confirm, confirm and confirm, as well as hopefully deny.

It was the longest morning of her life trying to get out the door once the nanny arrived Monday morning.

Cuddy swung by the CVS pharmacy halfway between her home and the hospital. She surreptitiously purchased several early pregnancy test kits and nervously tucked the bag against her chest until she got into her parked car. There, Cuddy tucked the kits in her glove compartment and locked it. She drove directly to work trying to think about anything but what she feared.

Cuddy paused in her car once she parked in her reserved slot and quickly debated what to do about the test kits. She decided to use them the following morning at home according to the packaging directions that stated hormonal differences were most evident in the first urine sample of the day. Making up her mind to wait until then, she grabbed her briefcase and exited the car. Halfway to the hospital's front door, Cuddy couldn't help it. She completely turned around and returned to the car where she quickly shoved one of the kits in her purse before re-locking the glovebox and car.

_This can not wait until tomorrow morning! I gotta know __**now**__,_ Cuddy thought to herself. She glided past the front desk signaling the head nurse she'd be back.

Cuddy quickly entered her office, double checked no one was hiding in it, threw her coat over the chair and raced into her own privatenac bathroom. In minutes she had followed the directions, peed on the kit's test stick and waited. Washing her hands slowly, she stared at the test stick waiting to see what would appear in the little stick's "window." A double blue line would mean she was pregnant. A blank window would mean she wasn't and could chalk up her nausea to stress or an impending cold, anything but pregnancy. It was the longest five minutes of her life. She began pacing back and forth sneaking peeks at the test stick's results window.

Meanwhile, Wilson had entered Cuddy's office just moments after she arrived. He had asked the head nurse Carmen to let him know when Cuddy got in this morning and true to her word, the head nurse buzzed him when she spied Cuddy approaching the glass doors to the lobby.

Wilson took the stairs instead of the elevator and was in her office with two minutes.

"Cuddy, are you here?" Wilson said loudly when he spied her empty office. He noted her coat tossed on the chair and saw the light on under her bathroom door.

_Oh, GOD!_ Cuddy panicked inside at the sound of Wilson's voice. If Wilson found out, he'd never contain himself and would be on the phone to House immediately! "I'll ...I'll be out in a minute," Cuddy said. She ran the water in the sink and stared at the test stick willing it to do something. It did.

Wilson heard a thud against the bathroom door and called out to Cuddy. "Cuddy? Are you all right in there?" No answer.

"Cuddy?" Wilson tapped on the door timidly. There was no sound. He could hear the sink's faucet running but Cuddy wasn't responding. He tried the doorknob and found it unlocked.

"Cuddy, I'm coming in now…" Wilson paused just in case Cuddy wasn't fully redressed. "Are you okay? "The door opened just wide enough for Wilson to see Cuddy passed out on the floor against the door.

"CUDDY!" Wilson yelped as he pushed the door a little more and tried to squeeze around it. Managing to get himself inside the bathroom, he let the door close and knelt beside her, checked her throat for a pulse and noticed the welt on her forehead where she had fallen against either the door or the floor.

"Cuddy? Wake up, it's me, Wilson."

Cuddy was unconscious. Wilson turned to the sink, grabbed a palmful of cold water and sprinkled it on her face. Her eyelids fluttered. Wilson turned off the faucet and returned to inspecting her face, he could see the welt on her forehead increasing in size and turning a dark shade of pink. She'd have a bruise for sure after the knot subsided.

"Cuddy?" Can you hear me?" Wilson slid his arm under her neck and hoisted her shoulders upward. He held her shoulder and checked her temperature with his other hand.

"What happened?" Cuddy asked hoarsely and began blinking a little. She moaned as her hand went to the pain throbbing from her forehead.

"You passed out or fainted or something and bumped your head. Do you understand me?" Wilson was alarmed. Cuddy's eyes fluttered open and for a brief moment she had no comprehension of why Wilson was holding her and why her head hurt.

"...Did I fall?" Cuddy was confused.

"Looks like it. How do you feel?"

"My head hurts," Cuddy admitted.

"I'll bet it does. You got quite a bump forming on your forehead," Wilson said. "One minute you were talking to me through the door and the next moment I heard a thud and …"

Cuddy suddenly remembered what she had been doing and quickly tried to scramble to get up and hide the pregnancy test kit box and stick, where ever they were.

"Hold on!" Wilson cautioned her. "Lets get you up slowly, okay?"

Cuddy nodded silently as her eyes raced around the floor and spied one of the items she feared Wilson would see. Wilson helped Cuddy to her feet and cupped her elbows to steady her. Cuddy reached for the door and angled her back to the test kit box sitting on the floor by the foot of the toilet. Hopefully Wilson hadn't seen it.

"You gonna tell me what happened in there?" Wilson said gently.

"I don't know," Cuddy lied. "I must have spilled some water when I washed my hands and just slipped in it when I reached for the hand towel. She sounded pretty convincing, even to herself.

"You've never been a klutz, Cuddy," Wilson said with a little frown as they walked her to her desk.

"I'm just tired and … a little stressed out. Guess I wasn't paying attention," Cuddy managed to say before Wilson let her sit down in her chair behind her desk. He stared at the knot on her forehead.

"That's gotta hurt," Wilson said pointing to her forehead. "Lets get you into the clinic and check you for a concussion."

Cuddy shook her head, "Not necessary…"

"God, doctors make the worst patients!" Wilson complained. "I'm not taking no for an answer, come on. Lets go."

"Please, James. I don't need everyone thinking I fainted. Can't you just check me out here?"

"Well, okay but I think you should take some aspirins and use an ice pack on that bump before it gets any bigger."

Cuddy agreed and Wilson proceeded with the concussion exam. Cuddy's eyes were a bit glass and she did seem a little spacey. "What I could really use is some coffee to clear my head," Cuddy hinted.

"Fine, I'll make a pot for you," Wilson stood to get the coffee karafe from the coffee maker but Cuddy quickly realized he'd have to fill it with water from her bathroom sink!

"No! Wait. Could you just bring a cup from the cafeteria for me?" Cuddy asked quickly.

"Uh, ...okay." Wilson didn't question her choice but went along. "Did you eat anything this morning?"

"Actually, no. I forgot to."

"I'll bring you some yogurt, too," Wilson offered.

Cuddy smiled and nodded. "You're very sweet, James. Thank you."

Wilson blushed a little, waved off the compliment and headed for her office door. "Don't move from that spot until I get back. I'll grab an ice pack from the clinic, too.

Cuddy leaned back into her desk chair and nodded. "I'm not going anywhere." Wilson seemed happy with her promise and left.

The moment he left her sight, Cuddy raced to the bathroom and surveyed the floor and counters. There was the box but where was that damn test stick? Her head hurt and she felt a little woozy just as she spied it resting against the small trash can where it must have skittered out of her hand when she fainted.

She carefully walked toward it as if she were approaching a cobra. Gently she bent down and picked it up. Turning it over, she couldn't ignore the two dark blue lines in the stick's results window. Cuddy _was _pregnant.

She wrapped the test stick in a hand towel, flattened the box it came in and returned to her office. She quickly slipped both items into her briefcase, tucking them deeply inside a small pocket. She felt as if she was in a drugged trance. She went back to her desk chair and sat down heavily.

"Dear God, what have I done?" Cuddy asked aloud. She closed her eyes and contemplated her options.

After just a few minutes, Wilson returned with two coffees, a chilled vanilla yogurt container and an ice pack.

"Good, you stayed put. Here, put this on your forehead," Wilson placed it against Cuddy's forehead and waited for her to hold it in place. "Here's your coffee and yogurt."

"Thanks, Wilson," Cuddy said with a forced smile. Wilson had noticed Cuddy's face was indeed several shades paler than before he left for the cafeteria.

"You don't look so good," Wilson said bluntly.

"Thanks a bunch," Cuddy frowned.

"No, seriously. You're face is pale as a ghost!" Wilson walked around her desk and sat against it just as he placed his hand across her forehead. "No fever, but I do think you need to get checked out in the clinic, Cuddy."

Cuddy began to protest. "Fine! Eat your breakfast and then lie down on your sofa over there. I'll stay until you get some color back in your face, okay?" Wilson was a real friend. Cuddy could have cried for all his gentle attention, something she needed now more than anything. Problem was, it was from the wrong man.

"I'm fine, really!" Cuddy tried to take the focus off herself. "I'm not really hungry but I do need the coffee," Cuddy added before taking a sip. The hot beverage helped her refocus a little more on Wilson's presence. The sofa across the room was beginning to sound like a good idea. The pair drank their coffee quietly for a few minutes and chatted about office business, each careful to avoid discussing the obvious elephant, _and his cane_, in the room.

After a few minutes, Wilson stood and gestured for Cuddy to head over to the sofa. Once there, she laid down and crossed her ankles at one end. Wilson adjusted the ice pack on her forehead for her. He tried to read her face but all he could see was a sadness to her expression, even with her eyes closed.

"I'm not going to lie here all day, you know," Cuddy said with eyes still closed.

"Well, for a little while until we know you're back to yourself," Wilson cajoled.

Cuddy nodded but kept her eyes closed. Wilson sat in the chair next to the sofa and finished his coffee, waiting for Cuddy to lead the discussion. She didn't. Her mind raced at the recent news only she knew. This was not the sort of information she would or could share with anyone. Besides, she needed to reconfirm the results and two more test boxes waited for her in her car.

xyxyxyxyxyxyxyx

**Your reviews are amazing! You are all such wonderful readers and your ideas really get my creative ideas flowing! Will do my best to work them in! Hope you won't get too upset by this latest turn in the story but I do think you'll like how things turn out. I can only hope that the writers are planning an unexpected Cuddy pregnancy for the show's finale. Cuddy trying to conceal it and House figuring it out is really the only way I can fathom House finally having the will to deal with his own abused childhood - by becoming a father. Especially when there's absolutely no possibility she'd terminate a pregnancy, even or especially because its House's baby. Please let me know your thoughts in your reviews. Should we keep going in this direction?**


	10. Blockade

**Dear Readers, thank you for the fabulous reviews. So good to hear others have similar thoughts and hopes for the show's direction. I can only hope you like where this is going. I fully intend to have my Huddy back together at some point and I'm hoping the show will work toward that outcome eventually. Meanwhile, here's a way to kill off the 3 week hiatus between the show's episodes 17 and 18 here in the states. **

_After a few minutes, Wilson stood and gestured for Cuddy to head over to the sofa. Once there, she laid down and crossed her ankles at one end. Wilson adjusted the ice pack on her forehead for her. He tried to read her face but all he could see was a sadness to her expression, even with her eyes closed. _

_"I'm not going to lie here all day, you know," Cuddy said with eyes still closed._

_"Well, for a little while until we know you're back to yourself," Wilson cajoled._

_Cuddy nodded but kept her eyes closed. Wilson sat in the chair next to the sofa and finished his coffee, waiting for Cuddy to lead the discussion. She didn't. Her mind raced at the recent news only she knew. This was not the sort of information she would or could share with anyone. Besides, she needed to reconfirm the results and two more test boxes waited for her in her car._

**yxyxyxyxyxxyxyx**

Dominka settled back in the cab and sighed. House was definitely a weird man. He had left this morning without a word to her. She was still a little sore from sleeping on the sofa and had found his note, a plane ticket and cash on the coffee table.

She was surprised more by the cash than the ticket destination. It kind of hurt a little to be treated like a hooker in a sense but she brushed it off. The round-trip ticket was for a flight that afternoon and left her just enough time to pack a suitcase. She considered not going and cashing in the ticket but realized he might be upset if she didn't go. Instead, she hurried to her apartment and packed a weekend bag.

She left her car at the apartment building and took a taxi to the airport. The note told her she was not to go anywhere the hospital and when he'd be back. Dominika checked her cell phone. No call from House. She scanned her cell phone log and realized she had missed a call the day before. She returned the call and relaxed in the back of the cab.

"Jacque? I'm sorry I didn't call you back yesterday," Dominika said softly.

"I was worried about you, Nikki," Jacque replied. He was happy to hear from her. "Where are you?"

"In a cab, I haff to go to da aeroport," Dominika confessed.

"Quoi?" Jacque sounded surprised.

"House, he wants that I go away for some dayz."

"Pourquoi? Is he not with you?"

"No, he eez gone, too"

"et...where are you going? When do you come back?" Jacque was a little worried.

"New York City for a week. We can be together when I be back," Dominika promised.

"Is House nice with you?…" Jacque didn't like the arrangement between his girlfriend and House but Dominika had convinced Jacque this was the quickest way to get her a green card. She let Jacque believe sex was not a part of the deal.

"He eez fine. I sleep on his sofa last night," Dominika admitted. "I am arrive at airport and I call you soon, ma cher."

"Wait! Why I don't drive to New York City and meet you there?" Jacque asked.

Dominika smiled. She loved the idea. "You can get away?"

"For a couple days, oui!" Jacque said quickly. "Check in and phone me back. Tell me where you stay in the city, okay?"

Dominika agreed, "Au revoir mon cheri."

"Au revoir," Jacque said with a smile.

**Yxyxyxyxyxxyxy**

Wilson's cell phone' alarm buzzed in his front right pocket letting him know his patient had arrived for the consult that morning. He didn't want to leave Cuddy's side but he had to attend to the meeting. Apparently, Cuddy was feeling much better, at least her forehead was, but her stomach, not so much.

"I'm fine, Wilson!" Cuddy convinced him. "Just go and if I need you I'll call you. By the way why did you come to see me this morning?"

Wilson smiled sheepishly and shrugged.

"Checking up on me every day really isn't necessary," Cuddy smiled at him. "I promise I won't jump off any balconies, okay?"

Wilson nodded, "Okay. Message received. Want to grab lunch later?"

"Uh yeah, sure."

After he finally left, Cuddy returned to her desk, pushed the call forwarding button to send her calls to the nurses' station and then sat there alone quietly contemplating several scenarios. Cuddy spun her chair around to face the windows and allowed her imagination to run away with her fears.

_If _she was pregnant. And, that was a _big IF_, Cuddy would have to keep that information to herself. With her track record of failed IVF attempts, she had been able to conceive only once out of the three times and even then, her body miscarried by the third month.

_If_ she was pregnant, there was no guarantee she would carry to full term. Cuddy couldn't believe she was factoring in a possible failure in her plans: why even tell House or anyone about the pregnancy if she might spontaneously miscarry, again. She realized sharing this information with House was begging for complications, more emotional pain and she couldn't bear it now that he had gone off and gotten married.

Cuddy thought about House and tried to imagine which time they had made love that she might have conceived. _If _she was pregnant, she couldn't be more than a month a long she estimated.

_If _she was pregnant, Cuddy calculated she'd deliver sometime around Thanksgiving. She had just turned 43 and was in great shape but still, her age had consequences. She would have to consider whether to test for Downs Syndrome which added risk to the situation of carrying full-term.

Would she even consider aborting if the baby had Downs Syndrome or some other birth defect? She didn't want to think about it. Right now she didn't really know if she even _was_ pregnant. Those damn home pregnancy kits were fairly accurate but they were known to give false-positive results in a small percentage of cases.

Cuddy thought through her sonogram appointment with Wilson prior to her kidney biopsy surgery. She remembered Wilson had focused on her kidney area, going no where near her abdomen. Still, if she was pregnant, the baby was little more than a fertilized egg, a zygote too tiny to register on the sonogram screen.

Her blood work taken before the surgery tested her white cell count and other functions related to her thyroid and kidney. Pregnancy testing was not part of that routine lab work. No way could she have her blood tested here and now at the hospital. Someone would _definitely_ find out and auction off that information to House immediately.

_If _she was pregnant, Cuddy would have to find an obstetrician far from Princeton Plainsboro Teaching Hospital. She'd have to find maternity clothes that didn't look like obvious maternity clothes. But until then, Cuddy would have to subtly change her wardrobe style immediately and start including include jackets and blazers that could help conceal a baby bump. She realized she'd have to start wearing her white doctor's coat every day from now on.

_If _she was pregnant, House would do the math once he realized her condition and he'd know he was the father. The last thing she needed was him trying something stupid like a custody battle for their baby. That is, _if _she was pregnant. No. House wouldn't want the baby, he wanted her. When he couldn't have her, he ran off and got married. Cuddy couldn't fathom House's reaction. Would he get clean again? Or would it drive them even further apart?

Cuddy realized she'd need to talk to a lawyer about that matter. And, she'd probably need a good cover story. Maybe she'd drop hints to Wilson that she had decided to give IVF another chance? Hey, if House could up and get married a week after their break-up, why couldn't she do something equally larger than life, life-changing, future-altering?

House and Wilson would assume she had gone back to finding a sperm donor. She'd let him think his honeymoon sent her over the edge and she had gone back with a vengeance to being artificially inseminated. Cuddy could play the premmie-card if she had to. Anything to throw House off the trail.

Then it hit her. What if it didn't matter to him? What if House just simply didn't care? What if House eventually realized he was the father at some point when she could no longer hide a pregnancy physically and ... He just didn't care? Showed no interest in wanting to know the child? After all, he was married now. Granted it wasn't a real marriage. Wilson told Cuddy about the green card situation with Dominika but _still_, what if House didn't want anything to do with her or the baby? That possibility hurt her more than any fears she was considering.

Maybe House would just ignore the situation? He _had_ sort of moved on, at least legally. What if he didn't care, or worse, hated her for this? Right now he was probably luxuriating somewhere with his little Green Card missus on his damn honeymoon. Cuddy frowned and refused to think about the woman he married. She brought her own thoughts back on track.

They had never really discussed birth control given Cuddy's health issues and lack of success with IVF. House _never_ used a condom with her. They had just somehow figured it wouldn't happen to them because it couldn't happen given her history with pregnancy. But, it did. At least she _hoped_ that was the case. Cuddy found herself smiling for a brief second realizing she felt excited and happy at the thought of being pregnant. Happy that if she were to ever have a baby of her own, it would be House's.

Cuddy's lips pressed together hard at the situation facing her. Apparently it was true what they say about infertile couples who adopt kids. Stop trying so hard to have a baby and if it's meant to happen, it will.

Cuddy jolted. Was this meant to happen to her? To them? House never discussed children with her. They were adjusting together to fashion his role in Rachel's life. House hadn't mentioned anything about his own childhood to her. She knew he wanted nothing to do with his own father. Cuddy remembered when House's father died, she had to drug House unconscious so Wilson could basically kidnap him and drive him to the funeral. House didn't talk much about his parents even after her own mother Arlene had visited.

Still, somehow Cuddy sensed House's appreciation for his own mother was genuine. Cuddy pondered over Wilson's comments after he and House returned from the senior House's funeral a couple years back.

According to Wilson, House had run a paternity test on his own dead father only to confirm what he had always believed: that Colonel John House was not House's biological father. Her mind flittered over other memories. House had once told Cuddy genes mattered when she asked for his feedback on her search for the best sperm donor among the numerous profile files. Cuddy wondered what genes House possessed that might be passed onto this baby.

_God, if I am pregnant, I...I will have this baby!_ She realized she was smiling to herself. _I'm a single mother raising a perfectly wonderful little girl. I can do this. I don't need House to do this. Not anymore_.

_If _she was pregnant, Cuddy was going to love this baby. But first, she had to confirm the test results weren't a fluke. She decided she needed to get as busy as possible right away to help make the time pass fast. She was looking forward to taking both home pregnancy tests in the morning. If they were positive, she'd book an appointment with a lab somewhere else and get the blood work drawn to confirm the pregnancy.

If she wasn't pregnant, well, that would just mean it wasn't meant to be. She would find a way to move on with her life and live it fully ...without House just as he had done so recently with his stupid marriage.

**Xyxyxyxyxyxyxyxy**

House drove in silence. The radio was a distraction. He needed to think about his plan of action.

Thirteen was in prison which explained why no one could locate her or had heard from her.

House had missed her. He worried about her well-being emotionally and physically. Life was definitely not fair. A young woman with such a fine mind would soon lose the ability to practice medicine, the ability to have a normal life and die much too soon. It reminded him of Amber. He quickly checked the review mirror and sighed with relief to see Amber wasn't sitting there in the backseat. Old fears were hard to shake.

House knew there was no point in wondering about Thirteen until she was able to answer questions. He'd let her know how he found out about her jail time in a barter plan to extract information from her. It was precisely the kind of thing they both enjoyed now and then. A mind-fuck to find out what they wanted to know.

House passed a grey lexus driving at exactly the speed limit on the highway. That sort of shit drove him up the wall. _Live on the edge, baby doll! _He thought to himself as he glanced at the woman driving the lexus. She had dark hair and a nice profile. For a split second he thought it was Cuddy driving the car. A second glance assured him it wasn't.

"Why can't I get her out of my mind?" House asked himself aloud. "Why did she leave me over one goddamn pill?" He could feel himself growing angrier as his foot pressed harder on the gas pedal. He was speeding through life until his radar detector buzzed noisly from his visor. Cop ahead somewhere on the highway. House shrugged off his thoughts and scanned the road ahead looking for the police car scanning for speeders.

He didn't see the cop car but slowed down all the same. He wondered if Dominika found the plane ticket and if she'd do as instructed. A few days in New York City would keep her entertained and out of his way until he could deal with his wayward duckling, Thirteen.

Bringing Thirteen back would definitely shake things up at the hospital. If nothing else, it would keep him and everyone else on their toes for a while. A decent distraction is what he craved at this point. His leg started cramping a bit after stomping the gas pedal and House realized he'd have to pull over and walk it off.

He drove onto the shoulder of the highway and put the car in park. House reached for his bottle of vicodin out of his coat pocket and popped the top off. Glancing inside he saw he was getting low on pills. Two would have to do for now. He threw them back and dry-swallowed them - just like old times. House caught his own reflection in the review mirror and frowned at what he saw: An angry man glaring back with pain-filled eyes. He stared just long enough to feel miserable.

House punched the radio button and a country station's music blared out of the speakers. _Oh hell, no! _House thought. The last thing he wanted to hear was some twangy cowboy crooning about how his woman dumped him or done him wrong. Hell, he was living that life. House quickly hit the scan button and searched for jazz. It took several attempts but he found something close enough to help take his mind off his thoughts. He turned up the volume, carefully put the car back in drive and edged out onto the highway. He had a mission for now and that included bringing Thirteen home.

**So, what do you think? A hottie like Dominika must have a boyfriend. Too bad he's not an American or she could have ignored House's offer. I'm hoping Thirteen will harass House over his quickie marriage (presuming he tells her about it). Love your ideas and am incorporating them as soon as possible. Feel free to share more ideas and plot points. Its much more fun to tap into others ideas as I write this theraputic fanfiction for us Huddies. Reviews are the best!**


	11. Salvo REVISED

**Dear Readers, ... **

_House punched the radio button and a country station's music blared out of the speakers. Oh hell, no! House thought. The last thing he wanted to hear was some twangy cowboy crooning about how his woman dumped him or done him wrong. Hell, he was living that life. House quickly hit the scan button and searched for jazz. It took several attempts but he found something close enough to help take his mind off his thoughts. He turned up the volume, carefully put the car back in drive and edged out onto the highway. He had a mission for now and that included bringing Thirteen home._

**Yxyxyxyxyxxyxyx**

Cuddy raced out of the office just after 5 pm. She had managed to avoid lunch with Wilson, afraid she might blurt out the news of her pregnancy. She had blamed her deferred plans, claiming a mild headache and asked if they could postpone until tomorrow. Wilson let her off the hook but still managed to pass by her office and glance in, twice she caught him and waved with a little smile. He got the message.

Cuddy prepared for her sister Julia's reaction to the bump on her head which indeed had discolored to a pale purple and was clearly visible. Julia would freak out in typical Julia-fashion and Cuddy would have to calm her down. She just needed to keep her thoughts to herself until Julia and Marina left her alone with Rachel.

By dinner time, Cuddy was mentally planning her nightly routine to include a sleeping pill to help her get through the night as quickly as possible. She had been rattled by the thought of being pregnant and found herself panicking at both possible outcomes. At no time did she really feel she would be relieved if she wasn't pregnant. Knowing herself deep down, Cuddy was almost afraid to acknowledge she hoped she was.

It would be hours before she could use the test kits. Thankfully, Rachel had worn herself out with her Aunt Julia and gone to bed easily. Cuddy found herself sitting on her own bed for nearly an hour staring at the two little test kit boxes, one in each hand. She considered numerous options on how and when to use both, resisting the urge to use one test immediately.

Finally, Cuddy decided she would use both first thing in the morning. She went through her normal toiletry routine of washing her face, brushing her teeth and applying moisturizer around her eyes. She took her sleeping pill and went to bed with a biography book she'd been meaning to finish. That was pointless. No matter how many times she read the pages, nothing sunk in. Cuddy got out of bed, headed into the bathroom, opened both test kits and laid everything out on the side of the tub next to the toilet. She read and reread the instructions to make sure she knew exactly what to do. Sufficiently satisfied with her preparations, Cuddy mentally planned out her steps for the following morning. All she really had to do was pee on the tips of the test sticks and wait. Then she'd know.

Cuddy sighed heavily before turning out the bathroom lights and headed back to her bed. She had given up on the book, opened the drawer in her nightstand and grabbed a suduko puzzle book and a pen. Flipping to the back section where the hardest puzzles were, she selected a "highly difficult" page and concentrated on figuring out the solution. It _was hard_ and that kept her attention until the sleeping pill kicked in.

The next morning, Cuddy's alarm woke her and she slammed the button to shut it off. Her eyes flew open as she realized it was TIME. She raced into the bathroom and hurried to the toilet. She was excited and yet dreading the inevitable results. Would she really, _really _be pregnant? She'd know in 6 minutes or less. Three test kits wouldn't lie!

Uncapping both test sticks, she carefully followed the instructions. Afterward, she placed both sticks on a neat pile of tissues and waited for the test windows to change in some way.

Cuddy knew sitting there and staring was only going to make time drag. She forced herself to go make her bed and open her curtains. That took three minutes. What to do for the next two minutes? She closed her eyes and did a little meditative breathing to relax her body and stop holding her breath without meaning to.

Cuddy closed the bathroom door and paced back and forth. One hand on her hip, the other covering her mouth preventatively as if she might scream. She stood still and counted to 60, eyes closed. Finally she had to look and confirm things one way or the other.

Cuddy put the toilet lid down and sat down. Inhaling a deep breath, she turned and faced the two sticks on the edge of her tub. Both had clear blue lines, two per stick. Cuddy was VERY pregnant! She felt a smile spread over her face. She was going to do everything in her power to have _this_ baby!

Both hands embraced her abdomen and for the first time, Cuddy allowed herself to acknowledge the presence of the baby. "You were meant to be, baby," Cuddy said softly.

**Xxyxyxyxyxyxyxyxyxyxy**

Walking into the hospital lobby as casually as she could, Cuddy had to continually remind herself that no one could tell she was pregnant yet she couldn't help but feel it was written all over her smiling face.

"Good morning, Dr. Cuddy," Nurse Eva said as she handed a stack of messages to Cuddy.

"It_ is_ a good morning, isn't it!" Cuddy greeted her before thanking her for the messages.

"You look happy," Nurse Eva prodded.

"Actually, I am," Cuddy acknowledged still smiling.

Nurse Eva was a bit surprised. Everyone in the hospital by now was well aware of Cuddy and House's romance, make that former-romance _and_ House's recent rebound wedding.

"Well, good for you!" The nurse said sweetly. She always liked the Dean of Medicine and couldn't help feeling like Cuddy had been run over twice by an out-of-control locomotive named House.

"Thanks!" Cuddy grinned and headed off to her office

**Xyxyxyxyxyxyxyxy**

House and Thirteen had spent several days getting reacquainted and learning about each other's lives during the time they were apart.

Thirteen was somehow surprised but not shocked that House and Cuddy had become a couple. It was inevitable but still, House was House and if it didn't work with Cuddy, it wouldn't have worked with anyone. Thirteen filed that concern in the back of her head for later consult.

House realized how much Thirteen was hurting. Killing her brother was an act of kindness wrapped in the worst kind of guilt. Doing for him what he needed jeopardized her sanity and the guilty overwhelmed her. Jail time had done her good. Thirteen need to sort things out and had come to the realization what she had done for her brother had to be done. It was the ultimate request and the ultimate response.

House felt somehow very close to Thirteen in a fatherly way, a new sensation. Here he could comfort without judgment. Thirteen need this from someone who knew what was going on in her life and wouldn't judge her. In fact, House had listened, shocked and silenced but listening none the less, and then had moved forward as if what she had done was the most normal thing in the world.

By the end of their roadtrip, House had offered her the kindest possibility of friendship. He had offered to help her end her own life when she needed it to happen. House knew that dignity and self-reliance were key to Thirteen's view of life and knowing someone would be there for her to do the ultimate act of kindness at the expense of personal freedom couldn't be ignored. This was big.

House was offering to help her in a way no one had. Not Foreman, not anyone could have made her feel as safe about the ultimate end.

When House dropped her off in front of her home, Thirteen was wiped with appreciation. House had told her in no uncertain terms he'd be there if she needed him to help end her life. She was all in. Thirteen was hooked. Whatever House needed to make his life better, Thirteen would make sure it happened.

**I don't know about you dear readers but I'm scared to death for the next few episodes of House before the season's finale. I can only hope certain things fall into place and if they don't well….then, they will here on . Thanks for reading and will try to update more often. Life's been busy!**


	12. Mrs Arlene Cuddy

_When House dropped her off in front of her home, Thirteen was wiped with appreciation. House had told her in no uncertain terms he'd be there if she needed him to help end her life. She was all in. Thirteen was hooked. Whatever House needed to make his life better, Thirteen would make sure it happened._

Cuddy sat her desk and found her hands drawn to her belly. She unconsciously held her herself waiting to feel something return the physicality. It would be months until she'd feel a baby's foot kick back or movement slide under her hand. Still she held her abdomen as if she held the child itself.

"Hey, pinkie. How are you this morning?" Cuddy asked her fetus. "Don't even think of sleeping on the job, baby! I need to know you're there." Cuddy whispered loudly. As if the baby heard her, Cuddy felt a small gurgle in her lower abdomen. Was that the baby reacting to her voice or just her wild imagination?

"You and me are a package deal. I've waited a long time for you, Pinkie," Cuddy responded. "Don't let me down and I won't let you down."

Wilson walked in and caught the tale end of Cuddy's conversation. He caught Cuddy's attention and she blushed. Wilson mouthed a message to her silently.

"Are you on speaker phone?"

Cuddy quickly nodded and lifted the handset before setting it back down into the phone cradle.

"Yes, done. What's up?" Cuddy played along.

"Just dropped by to see what's going on?" Wilson said a little guiltily. "I just wanted to see how you were doing."

"I'm good, James," Cuddy smiled.

"How's House?" Wilson asked.

"How should I know?" Cuddy replied a little curtly.

Wilson felt like an idiot. "I meant has he stopped in lately?"

Cuddy glanced away, "No. I haven't seen him in a while, why?"

"No reason," Wilson said quickly.

"Something I can do for you?" Cuddy asked Wilson who looked a little sheepish.

"No...uh...no, I just wanted to see how my favorite boss was doing and make sure you were okay," Wilson ad-libbed.

"I'm perfectly fine, James."

"I can see that...okay then, guess I'll be leaving now…" Wilson sort of clapped his hands awkwardly before spinning on his heel and leaving Cuddy's office silently. "Well that didn't go nearly as well as I'd hoped."

Cuddy shook her head at Wilson. He was so transparent. Clearly he was worried about her state of mind as if _she'd_ be the one to go off the deep end when House was exhibiting all the signs of someone dealing badly with a break up, of being dumped.

No one knew Cuddy's little secret smaller than a peanut at this very moment. That little "nut" was the center of her universe and House a distant second

It had been just a few weeks since their break up but House felt as if it was only yesterday. Seeing Cuddy walking the halls of Princeton Plainsboro pained him deeply. He couldn't help but notice the line of her trim waist, her curves, her legs. That woman had the best damn legs! He missed her beautiful sparkling eyes and that million watt smile. Even her frown aroused him. House missed her.

Getting her to come back to him would take more than he could fathom at this moment despite the hours he spent staring at his bedroom ceiling at night wondering how he could turn her mind around. House hadn't given up inside yet to the world, he acted as if he was glad, glad she was out of his life. As if he was better off when nothing could be further from the truth.

His phone rang. A lawyer he had never heard of left a voicemail message for a "Doctor Gregory House" who is being sued by one Cuddy." House smiled as the message sunk in. He deleted the call without bothering to return it and sat back and waited for Cuddy to drop by.

Thirteen and Taub were discussing the patient not 45 minutes later when Cuddy made her entrance into the diagnostics room akin to House's office.

House worked at not appearing happy to see her but she was stunning. Cuddy's grey dress hugged her every curve and plunged narrowly between her lovely breasts revealing her delicate collar bones and silky skin.

"My mother is suing the hospital," Cuddy began. House knew Cuddy was speaking but he couldn't help but tune out as he stared at the woman before him. She was unbelievably lush. Cuddy's full lips, her deep-set eyes, her flawless skin, strong stubborn chin and arched eye brows only made him want to hold her close and inhale her scent.

"What?" House asked blindly.

"My mother?" Cuddy said curtly.

"Aww yes, I was just thinking how much I wanted a relationship without sex where I still get to deal with your mother," House said glibly. Cuddy smirked in return.

"I need you to attend a meeting with both her and her lawyer, House."

"Like that's gonna happen," House said firmly. "Go!" He admonished his team after determining the list of tests on the lottery-winning loser seeking his long lost love. Cuddy wasn't quite sure if he was telling her to get lost or his team. She rolled her slate grey eyes and spun around to follow House from the team room into House's office.

House whipped out his bottle of prescription vicodin and popped two pills into his hand as Cuddy glared at him. "I need these as I'm about to experience a sharp pain in my ass," House murmured before tossing two pills down his throat. Cuddy ignored him.

"We had a fight last night after I asked her to move in and now my mother's suing the hospital!"

"How's this my problem?" House asked.

"You're the doctor's who's name is on her patient records, who treated her after she fired you…" Cuddy said dryly.

"Oh I get it. My name is House and she's confused moving into your house with me…"

"Shut up," Cuddy said flatly. "I need you to meet with her. She won't drop the matter unless both you and I meet her for settlement talks."

"Too bad. Not gonna be there." House said flippantly as he passed by Cuddy and exited his office. The look of disappointment spread sadness across her face.

"Where's Doctor House?" Arlene's attorney asked Cuddy as he and Arlene entered the conference room.

"I didn't want him here," Cuddy admitted. Arlene frowned and glanced back at her attorney. "Come on, can't we discuss this?

Before Arlene could respond, House entered the conference room and dropped a tray with medical bandages and a few other items onto the conference room.

"I thought you didn't want to …" Cuddy began.

"How could I stay away after you said pretty please with sugar on top?" House quipped. Cuddy frowned and sighed exasperatedly.

"We don't give refunds but we do give credits," House told Arlene gesturing to the tray of medical supplies. Before House could continue, Arlene rose slowly and headed for the door.

"If Dr. House isn't going to take this seriously, I know a few judges who will," Arlene stated before leaving. Her attorney followed behind quickly leaving Cuddy to rub her forehead wishing her migraine away.

"Was I suppose to be the good cop?" House asked Cuddy?

Wilson had been ruminating over House's latest visit. House and Cuddy were definitely miserable without each other. It felt good to tell them to shut up and listen to him. Wilson couldn't help but notice House's hopeful face when Wilson admonished Cuddy telling her she still cared about House and Cuddy stayed silent. At least she didn't contradict him. Wilson could see House's hopes expand at that very moment.

Not for one second did Wilson believe House's lame comment he was better off without Cuddy. Deflection pure and simple. Standard House behavior.

Getting these two idiots back together was going to require help. Wilson pulled his cell phone out of his pants pocket and googled Arlene Cuddy's phone number.

The alarms shrilled loudly as nurses began racing through the corridors of the hospital seeking guidance and yet hurrying to get patients out of the building. Cuddy glanced up and sighed deeply.

"What the actual fuck is going on!" Cuddy asked herself mentally. "This better not be House's doing!" Cuddy hurried toward her office door and surveyed the nurses station. Everyone was following standard protocol to exit the building in a mannerly and pre-planned method. Clinic patients were quickly dispatched through the emergency room doors.

The elevators popped open and Cuddy could see House was among the groups inside them. She quickly turned away from him and greeted two people headed in her direction, one the hospital's chief legal counsel and the other a newly hired man in charge of Human Resources who had the unfortunate habit of checking her out while speaking to her directly. She could feel his eyes on her body. Ick.

"We have to leave the building right now," Cuddy notified the pair and led them to the exit. "We need to find out why the alarms are going off before we evacuate the building. I don't want patients…." Cuddy's voice trailed off as she spotted her own mother walking slowly toward her outside the building.

"Mom?"

Arlene glanced up into Cuddy's confused face. "It's the only way I knew how to get both of you in the same place at the same time," Arlene admitted as she gestured toward House sitting a few feet behind Cuddy on a low, cement wall. House glanced up and spotted the once possible mother-in-law.

Cuddy glanced over her shoulder and spied House and it all made sense immediately. "Stop the evacuation. Let everyone return to the building," Cuddy told the administrative pair of department heads. They quickly departed leaving House and Cuddy standing before a sheepish Arlene.

"We're not getting back together," House announced. Cuddy's head snapped in his direction. Cuddy realized all of Arlene's antics were exposed by House's brilliant diagnoses.

"House, this isn't about that. It's about some one thousandth imagined slight…" Cuddy began.

"You never intended to sue the hospital. All this was just to get us in the same room," House added.

"Look at you two idiots. Who else would have you?" Arlene said bluntly. Cuddy was caught off-guard by her mother's guilty expression. House was right. Arlene wanted House and Cuddy back together.

"I asked you to move in with me and you realized we weren't going to reconcile…" Cuddy suddenly realized her mother's reaction was a desperate one aimed at bringing House and her together once more.

"You can't keep a man long enough to cook him a meal," Arlene continued as Cuddy swallowed hard and stepped forward, embracing her mother gently before hugging her tightly.

"It's going to take more than a common enemy," Cuddy told Arlene seriously.

"You and your impossibly high standards," Arlene finished. Cuddy grimaced but hugged her mother back before pulling back and looking over her shoulder for House who had disappeared.

House stood in his office replaying what had just happened. He stood there hopeless. The woman he loved was not willing to try to reunite with him. Even her own mother wanted them together but Cuddy didn't want to try. It hurt bad.

House grabbed his backpack, slung it over his shoulder and wandered out of his office in the slow pace of a depressed man. Seeing her now would send him over the edge. She glowed in his eyes. Cuddy was more beautiful, more beguiling, more intriguing now than before and she had never wanted him less. He felt the lump in his throat swell. House needed to get out of there fast.

Sorry for the lengthy time between updates but I was stymied by the hiatus and possible directions the show was going to take. Maybe I was the only one to see this in the episode #20 OR #21 "Changes" but it seemed to me the producers and writers were studding the scripts with references to Huddy not being anywhere near over. Its clear both House and Cuddy are miserable being apart but Cuddy needs to stick to her guns that she had every right to break up with House (the addict, dick-head boyfriend with selfish antics and an unwillingness to be kind to his lady love.) House, meanwhile, is hoping she'll take him back but his wounded pride keeps him from making the right decisions and so he continues on his self-destructive path of pretending he's better off without her when everyone around them can see both House and Cuddy should be together. As Wilson said, Cuddy should have known better than to expect House to be anything other than himself and House for being himself.

Any ideas for where the season finale will end up? 'll do my best to incorporate it into this fanfic. Let me know your thoughts.


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